


What is "Karma", hyung?

by ChairmanChurch



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Awkward Jongin, Babysitter AU, Eventual Smut, Fluff and Humor, M/M, Single Parent AU, Sweet grumpy-assed Kyungsoo, is that even a thing??, two-sided crush
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-11
Updated: 2017-06-08
Packaged: 2018-10-16 22:44:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 28,528
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10581033
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChairmanChurch/pseuds/ChairmanChurch
Summary: A story in which Do Kyungsoo has a three-year-old tiny bundle named Kyo Jin and a stranger in yellow brief slash his son's babysitter slash his secret crush named Kim Jongin (and unfortunately a worst best friend Byun Baekhyun and his loud-mouthed giant boyfriend Park Chanyeol) in a rickety house.





	1. A ladle

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been months since I wrote something. And this is the first time I wrote Kaisoo. There're many single parents!au and babysitting!au in Kaisoo fandom but I still really hope that you guys will enjoy it (somehow)!!
> 
> The name of Kyungsoo's son was actually made up by emitting some letters in both Kyungsoo (Kyo) and Jongin (Jin) lmao. Idk if Kyo Jin is a Korean name, but still find myself really clever haha *laughs nervously* The only knowledge of babies I get is from my own experience of taking care of my niece, so I can't reassure everything relating to babies in this fic is exact.
> 
> I own nothing but the plot and writing mistakes!
> 
> ~o~  
> Enjoy!!

Kyungsoo never believed in what people called _'Karma'_ , especially when his unfortunately best friend Baekhyun used that term after doing shitty things just to make excuses for himself from being castrated. _Good things will come to good people_ , Baekhyun said. _Bad things will come to people who don't know how to forgive_ , Baekhyun repeatedly said.

 _So what about bad things come to bad people who don't know when to stop screwing others' life up_ , Kyungsoo mumbled to himself as he struggled to fish his key chain from his pocket with a three-year-old boy sleeping on his right hip and a dozens of grocery bags in his left hand. He knew, he knew that he didn't need to buy that much, but being a single dad with two part-time jobs and a little free time to go grocery and a best friend who unwelcomely dropped by Kyungsoo's at any ungodly hour and that best friend being a glutton despite his small stature forced him to stock up his supplies. Kyungsoo wondered why he still befriended with that little piece of shit and fed him albeit his tight budget.

Kyungsoo suppressed a loud moan when he found out that the door was unlocked (after plunging the key into the lock, fuck it) and kicked the door open, carefully—because he couldn't afford to break the door that was already rotten and make his little ball of sunshine in his arms awake—to get into his house. If you were wondering why Kyungsoo had left the house without locking the door, he would inform you that he hadn't, but he knew for sure what—or rather who—was the cause of it.

"If you're planning to live under my ducking roof, can you at least help me to carry the ducking groceries, you ducker?" Kyungsoo hissed as he threw those said groceries onto the figure sleeping on his couch.

"Calm the fuck down, Satan," Baekhyun groaned as he rubbed his hand over his over-eye-lined eyes and gathered the grocery bags with his free one. "And you don't have to replace fuck with duck, Kyo Jin is sleeping anyways."

"Shut up," Kyungsoo hissed quietly, rocking back and forth as he sensed his Jinni stir and babble frettingly in his fitful sleep. "Just get your fart box out of my couch and put the groceries onto the kitchen counter."

Baekhyun cursed something under his breath that Kyungsoo couldn't quite catch, but it sounded like _'a constipated dickhead'_ , and dragged himself with the grocery bags into the kitchen. If anything, ones should know to never argue with Kyungsoo when he was giving that glare of Satan.

Kyungsoo gently laid Kyo Jin down onto the baby boucer next to the couch and gave him a soft kiss on the forehead before striding towards the kitchen. Baekhyun had already made himself a small feast, Kyungsoo noted bitterly, given by cans of tuna and beef and slides of bread lying haphazardly over the dining table top.

Kyungsoo huffed and made his way to put things into cupboards and his small fridge orderly. Diapers and toys had to wait though, since Kyungsoo was out of energy right now. Kyo Jin could walk already, or rather, stumble along the way if needed to, but he had literally dozed off against Kyungsoo's leg as his father had waited for the ground meat. And who was Kyungsoo to say no to his son, so he had had to do the shopping with a sleeping baby in his arms. Luckily, there had been many women offering help for him in the supermarket. A young single dad and his baby were just an adorable sight to be hold after all.

"Why are you here anyway? Aren't you supposed to be fucking right now?" Kyungsoo plopped onto the chair next to his friend, picking up a slide of bread and chomping on it.

"Chanyeol practically ran off to the bathroom when I barely touched his waistband," Baekhyun frowned, "that dickless giant. Or that his size is funny despite being that tall that—"

Kyungsoo had tuned out his horny best friend right after asking the question, contemplating about his own problems. Yifan, his weird cool-wanna-be boss at the bakery shop (but still kind enough to allow Kyungsoo to bring his child to work), was considering promoting him from a morning-shifted cashier to a full-time cashier. But that meant Kyungsoo would have to work for longer hour, and his freelance work as a novel translation would have to wait until late hour when he got home. And that also meant he would have less time for his Kyo Jin and he didn't really fancy the prospect of bringing his son to the shop for a whole long day; half a day was bothersome enough. Say Kyungsoo stubborn, but he would not send his son to kindergarten until he reached four. Kyo Jin was three but so small as a two-year-old and didn't have good health as other fellows—another thing of growing up without a proper mother's care. Kyungsoo had been always trying to make up for it though. He had already posted a babysitting job on a local newspaper with a low wage with the hope that some broke college student would consider the job, and turned down many candidates just simply because they all wanted a higher salary.

All of the sudden, a strange cooing sound pulled him out of his reverie, his head snapping up from the bread to gauge at his friend. A questioning look on Baekhyun's face showed him that he wasn't the source of that voice either.

Without a second to think, both of them darted through the hallway to get to the living room.

"Wha—? What the fuck?" Kyungsoo shouted as he ran towards where his son was lying and beckoned for Baekhyun to get something, anything, to defend themselves. He hoped beyond hope that they had that kind of telepathy at this point.

"Get your fucking hands off him," he shouted again, not bothering to avoid curse words this time around, as he lunged his body forwards to shove the stranger away. The stranger, who had formerly been poking at Kyo Jin's cheek, was falling back onto his butt with an unmanly yelp. Kyungsoo hurrily scooped his son up and gathered him into his arms. Kyo Jin whimpered as he blinked his eyes open, lower lip quivering when he choked out a sob. "Who the fuck are you? How did you get in here? I'll call the police—"

Kyo Jin jolted at the commotion and that everyone kept yelling and started to cry as Kyungsoo took several steps back away from the stranger. _This is a mess_ , Kyungsoo groaned innerly. Baekhyun had come back with a ladle—and what the hell they would do with a ladle to a stranger that was that tall and intimidating and almost naked—what? Naked?

"A fucking ladle—?"

"Where the hell are you keeping your knives?" Baekhyun snapped in union with Kyungsoo. Well, that explained something. One shouldn't put knives in children's reach after all.

"Police? Oh you should call them," the stranger piped in, rising to his feet as rubbing at his sore butt. "I've just been robbed in that dark alley next to your house, and what century we are in that they had to even strip off my clothes. I mean I didn't have fancy clothes like Louis Vuitton or Gucci or anything, I just bought mine on that Black Friday last week, they even discounted up to 90% do you know? Luckily they still had decency to leave me with my brief and—"

"Is there any alyssum near here?" Baekhyun whispered after sauntering up to Kyungsoo as the stranger still kept reporting his case. "Because I think we've got one escaper here."

Kyungsoo hissed and handed a crying baby to his friend and yanked a ladle from his grip. Anything would do for now, he decided as he growled and trotted forwards until he reached the stranger with yellow brief.

"Ouch," the stranger jumped as Kyungsoo smacked his bicep with the ladle and began to bodily shove him towards the front door which was still unlocked. Damn it, Kyungsoo cursed internally, why he always picked up bad habits from Baekhyun. "What are you doing?"

"What am _I_ doing? You broke into my house," Kyungsoo gritted through his teeth. He even didn't know why he bothered answer the question in the first place. "Now get out you fucker."

"Wait, stop," the stranger panted, using his forearm to push against the door after being shoved out of the door line. "I'm here for the job interview. The babysitter one."

That stopped Kyungsoo from pushing the door close. "Wha—?"

"I read your post on the local newspaper," the stranger hastily explained, peeking his face through the small gap between the door and its frame to look at Kyungsoo, a plea in his eyes. "And your door was open and the lights were on. I know I shouldn't have come in without being invited, that I'm sorry, but you have no doorbell and I knocked thrice and no one came out and—"

"Could you stop talking?" Kyungsoo shouted, cutting the stranger off his rant. It took just five minutes for him to know this stranger had a really bad habit of rambling.

The boy outside the door embarrassedly clamped his palm onto his mouth to stop his talking. Kyungsoo took advantage of this distraction to push the door shut with another unmanly squeal from the stranger.

"Are you sure you're not a juvenile delinquent?" Kyungsoo asked through the door.

"I swear I'm not," the stranger whined. To be honest, any juvenile delinquent would swear that, Kyungsoo's rational part informed him helpfully. "And please let me in, it's really cold out here."

Kyungsoo needed to think. He was considering just shooing the stranger away because it was already late and Kyo Jin's bed time, and a headache was already forming in his throbbing head. But the weather was cold indeed and the stranger was naked save for his yellow brief and he even didn't have shoes on and bare feet on a snowy night was not good for health after all. 

And not that it was totally the stranger's fault anyway. The door was open and someone just barging into his house had become a daily thing, really. Kyungsoo had learnt to accept uninvited guests after being friends with Baekhyun and Chanyeol, who had somehow managed to stole his spare key, goddamnit. And not that a theft could benefit anything in his house though, since there was nothing worth being stolen. Kyungsoo was not rich by any mean, the only thing that mattered to him was Kyo Jin, and the boy practically by his side all the time so no much should be worried.

And wasn't he just being really biased in the stranger here, just because he had a nice and warm voice?

With a long suffering sigh, Kyungsoo creaked the door open an inch to peep out.

"Thanks, for opening the door again," the stranger said gratefully as he wrapped his arms around himself. They stood on the threshold in stiff silence. Kyungsoo, with the ladle still in his grip and ready to attack at any needed moment, scrutinized the boy in front of him. Despite being taller, the stranger was undoubtedly younger than him, given by his greenish look on his face and the way he stared nervously down at his bare feet and fidgeting toes.

"So can I come in?" The stranger murmured as he looked up at Kyungsoo through his eyelashes. The orange light seeping through the door beamed onto his tanned complexion, making him look more golden and beautif—what? Kyungsoo slapped himself mentally for having that thought and stepped aside to let the boy in.

They silently strode into the living room and found Kyo Jin already sleeping in Baekhyun's arms, who was eating again as if nothing had happened and turned his head from the marshmallow bag to look up at them with a raised eyebrow.

Kyungsoo wordlessly took a seat next to Baekhyun on the couch and watched the stranger sit down on the pink bean bag chair on the other side of the coffee table, the one Baekhyun had prodigally ordered on Ebay last month. It dipped under the boy's weight, making him lose balance and almost stumble backwards with an oof sound.

"So you must be Do Kyungsoo? I'm Jongin by the way," the stranger—Jongin—introduced bashfully after managing to find a comfortable position on the fluffy chair. At Kyungsoo's frown and Baekhyun's narrowed eyes, he gulped and continued, perhaps not sure why an interview he had prepared for so carefully had become this awkward interrogation. "Uhm, so I'm eighteen years old and I'm looking for a job because, uhm, you know—I need money to afford a living and hopefully college too."

Kyungsoo crossed his arms, the ladle still in one hand, and cleared his throat. "You said you had been robbed, so is there anyway we can get your identity papers? Just to make sure you're not fooling us."

"Oh," Jongin's mouth formed a small round shape at that, and he abruptly stood up and Kyungsoo immediately flung his hand with the ladle towards him in defense in case this naked dude wanted to do some stupid shit. Jongin startled a little at his action but he just waved Kyungsoo's hand off as he bended down to pick up something next to the baby boucer.

"I have my résumé here. Robbers don't really care about the information of their victims anyway." Jongin made himself sit down on the gaudy chair again and handed Kyungsoo the résumé. "So I guess this is your son?"

Kyungsoo nodded wordlessly as he skimmed through the papers. Kim Jongin, 14-01-1994. As he looked through, he noticed that the papers were ones of an orphan. Jongin seemed to read his thought, though, since he started again before Kyungsoo could ask more about his address and ways of contact. "So I've come of age so I need to find my own job outside the orphanage to earn a living. And I was really good with kids when I was still living there, so I think I can take care of one." He was smiling now and looking gently at Kyo Jin. Kyungsoo had never seen that much sparkles in one's eyes.

"You should hire him," Baekhyun spoke up the first time after a long moment, which was odd.

"Why? I haven't even considered." Kyungsoo asked without a second thought, not missing the hurt look in Jongin's eyes.

"Because he's hot," Baekhyun smirked and damn it, how much Kyunsoo hated that smirk because it only meant bad intentions behind it. This is not good.

"Please just shut up," Kyungsoo ran a hand over his face with an extravagant sigh.

"Oh come on, he's like super hot. Look at those abs. I bet he can do more than just babysitting with that face and body, he can even take care of the dad not just the son—" Baekhyun chirped with his annoying high pitch.

Kyungsoo refrained himself from strangling his ex best friend and sent Jongin an apologetic look.

"So uhm, as the object of your description, I think I should say thanks?" Jongin blushed a rosy hue on his high-boned cheeks. "I haven't taken care of an adult before, but if Kyungsoo got sick or something, I think I could get him some aspirin maybe, uh—" he trailed off weakly, definitely not knowing where this talk was heading.

"And he's innocent as hell, Kyungsoo, you can ruin him any way you want," Baekhyun hid his mouth behind his hands, body shook from laughing. Lucky for him Kyo Jin was sleeping heavily or else the house would be full of screaming crying by now. Kyungsoo just wantted to dig a hole for himself out of humiliation at this point.

"Wha—?" Jongin looked flabbergasted at this as he seemed to understand what Baekhyun was referring, shaking his head fiercely. "It's not what I mean—I... May I ask where is the mom?" Jongin suddenly asked out of the topic and scratching the back of his neck, clearly trying to turn the conversation into other direction.

"Oh, Kyungsoo's sister? She left with another man to some country in Europe I think," Baekhyun informed usefully. That was the truth, but somehow it had Jongin's eyes widen more in bewilderment.

"Oh," Jongin mumbled, blinking his eyes several times before clearing his throat. "So, uh, Kyungsoo's sister, she and Kyungsoo, uh—?"

That was when Kyungsoo realized what was not so right in the statement. A loss information. There was a snicker from beside Kyungsoo. Fuck you, Bun Baekhyun.

"Oh, no. No no no. That's not what you're thinking," Kyungsoo hastily shook his head. "My sister is Kyo Jin's biological mother. I became his father after she left. That's all."

"Oh, okay," Jongin seemed relieved then and he gave a small smile. "So, uh—" He looked bothered again, "Oh God, this is hard. I've never had an interview before. Is it always this awkward?"

"Nope," Baekhyun chimed in again with a pop sound of his mouth. "Normally it'd be professional. But that break into our house incident and you look hotter than fire without clothes and Kyungsoo hasn't got laid for years make this interview so suffocating and full of sexual tension. So now if you excuse me," Baekhyun only said it after finishing the sweet, since food was the only thing that kept him in a conversation. "I have to plot a new plan to get into my boyfriend's pants after two years of dating."

Speaking of devil. And why the hell Kyungsoo forgot to lock the door, again?

"Hey Kyungsoo, is Baekhyunni here?" An obnoxiously loud voice boomed from the hallway and almost woke Kyo Jin up. Kyungsoo swore he would kill his friends some day soon. Chanyeol appeared at the doorframe of the living room after some moments with all thick coat and scarf and beanie. He perked up at the sight of his boyfriend. "Oh, you're here, Baek. Why did you leave? I just went to the bathroom to get some lube but you had already left when I—Ouch, fuck, what the fuck Kyungsoo??"

"You two just get the fuck out," Kyungsoo growled after flinging the ladle at the giant's head, surprised himself when it hit the target. He picked Kyo Jin up from Baekhyun's embrace and passed him to Jongin despite trust issues and better judgement. It seemed like Jongin was the only sane human in this room right now. Jongin welcomed the baby into his arms with a look of someone being granted an award.

"Get out, get out," Kyungsoo hissed as he mustered up what left of his energy to push the couple out of the house and locked the door this time. 

When he got back to the living room, Jongin was holding his son tightly against his bare chest. Kyo Jin's light skin made a striking contrast to Jongin's tanned one, and it looked just perfectly beautiful that had Kyungsoo's breath hitch in his throat for some unnamed reason.

After that he signed the labour contract with Jongin without any further questions. He made that fast decision maybe because he was really tired and in need of a good sleep now, or maybe because he really needed someone, not his useless friends, to help him out this time, or maybe just because of the tender gaze that Jongin was giving his Kyo Jin and how at ease it made Kyungsoo feel inside his chest. Or maybe Kyungsoo just really needed someone to hold Kyo Jin with him for a really long while.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!! Kudos and comments are always welcome!! If there are any mistakes, please tell me, it'll help me a lot and be appreciated!


	2. A spoon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back with Chapter 2, yay!! There're many EXO members in this chap, it's brief but I had fun writing them. Though I have to say sorry because even when I want to, I kinda sucks at writing humor *sobs* Hope you guys will enjoy it as much as I enjoy writing Kaisoo.

The first thing Kyungsoo did was to lead Jongin—a still merely stranger—around his house. It was not big, and he had sold most of the furnitures since Kyo Jin and he had been left behind. He only kept the most basic, necessary ones and stupid stuff that his friends and coworkers had bought Kyo Jin and him on some occasions. He wanted to throw all of them away too, but still kept for the sake of others' sentiments.

Jongin was still cradling Kyo Jin against his chest, the boy's head on his shoulder, as he followed Kyungsoo. Whenever he tried to gawk or touch those eerie stuff—a sperm-shaped lamb, a tree-shaped coat stand with more ranches than necessary, and a collection of shit-shaped picture frames, Kyungsoo shooed him to the next destination of the house, clearly embarrassed by those stuff that Jongin was sure not his own buying. It just took only a brief glance at Kyungsoo and you would know that he was no man of excessive ornaments.

"It's already late, you know." Kyungsoo informed in a dismissal tone—he just really needed sleep right now— after helping Jongin gently lay Kyo Jin onto his crib. His son was nippling onto the pink pacifier that Baekhyun had bought him on his three-year-old birthday last month. Kyungsoo knew Kyo Jin was old enough that he didn't need a pacifier, but he was just too drained out to wean him from the soother. He promised to himself that he would do it soon.

Jongin stood somehow helplessly at the door frame of the bedroom, shivering once in awhile, and played with his fingers as he looked at the floor.

"I can lend you some clothes so you can get home," Kyungsoo suggested, not so enthusiastic.

"Oh," Jongin looked up at him at this, "Oh, that's really nice of you. You know, uhm, I don't really have a home to go, so I have a friend, Sehun, he agreed to put me up after I left the orphanage. Could I borrow your phone to call him?"

Kyungsoo nodded and approached Jongin to hand him his phone. The taller got out of the room to call for his friend and came back after some minutes with a tired expression on his face.

"So I guess Sehun couldn't let you in tonight?" Kyungsoo started, because Jongin looked like he didn't know how to say what he had to say.

"Yeah," Jongin breathed out, seemingly half relieved that Kyungsoo had already sensed his struggle, half embarrassed of what reason he was going to say. "He's having, uhm, stuff, with his boyfriend Luhan right at this moment so he can't—"

Kyungsoo stiffed a laugh at that because man, he would not sell his laugh that easily to someone he just met, but he couldn't help an amused snort. He knew exactly that was how best friends were like; they would ditch you if having the sex of their life. And it was funny just because "You tend to give too much information, don't you?"

"Huh?"

"You haven't even known my friends' names after meeting them, and I already know about your fondness of buying discount products, about your friend and his boyfriend and their sex life. And about you being practically homeless right now."

Jongin couldn't find it in himself to feel offended at the statement, since Kyungsoo's words had no bite, and despite a light frown that seemed always on his face, his eyes showed a gleam of empathy.

"Uhm, I didn't mean to tell you something that you don't want to hear. I just thought I should explain things that—"

"Don't worry," Kyungsoo cut him off. "Unless it wakes Jinni up. Really." He ran his hand through his already messy hair as he offered. "You can stay here tonight, though I'm afraid you have to take the couch since I only have one bed as you can see."

The couch was much better if compared to a bed next to a so thin wall that you could hear moans from across it, Jongin decided.

~o~

"You look ridiculous." was the first thing Kyungsoo said when Jongin emerged out of the bathroom. Though Jongin couldn't see the necessity of going to the bathroom since he had just put on more clothes, not undressing, Kyungsoo had insisted him to.

"This is what you gave me," Jongin frowned and looked down at his own body. "Are you sure these are the biggest you have?"

The grey sweatpants looked like a pair of culottes, the waistband couldn't even reach pass his hipbones. The brown sweater that Kyungsoo had lent him was fitted onto his upper like a second skin. The hem of it was almost revealing his belly button, which he used both his hands to pull it down, and the sleeves were half up his forearms. Even when he was having more fabric on right now, somehow Jongin couldn't help but feel more exposed than when he had only cladded in a brief.

"Yes," Kyungsoo squinted at him then snorted. "You're stretching and ruining my clothes, you know? So stop complaining."

Kyungsoo handed him a pillow and a small-sized blanket that Jongin doubted it could cover all of his body. Jongin had a habit of sleeping with his head under blankets, he didn't expect he could survive this night.

"Can I make a report to the police now?" Jongin whined as Kyungsoo led him out of the bedroom. " I know it's not much, but at this very moment I really need my stuff back."

"You will call them tomorrow. Now I don't feel up to dealing with police in my house, and getting you to the police station in this snowy night is just NO."

"So you will help me to the police station tomorrow?" Jongin asked as he saw less and less of Kyungsoo's small frame when the door was closing.

"I hired a babysitter, why now I'm feeling like I'm taking another child under my wigs?" Kyungsoo's voice was cold and he huffed out a tired breath as he closed the door.

And when Jongin reached the staircase leading down to the living room, he heard a creak of the door and Kyungsoo's small voice "There's a new toothbrush in the cabinet in the first floor bathroom." 

Maybe Kyungsoo wasn't that cold.

~o~

The first thing Jongin realized when he woke up was that he was really hot, like really literally, and feeling like suffocated. He sat up straight so fast his head spun. He was wrapped around a pile of blankets, not like how he remembered he had been last night with only a funny sized one. There were at least four of them now from thick one to thin one to baby one. _And is that a mattress cover?_

"Yes, they only left him with a brief." Jongin heard a faint sound from the kitchen as he struggled to get himself out of the blanket cocoon.

Kyungsoo was feeding Kyo Jin with a phone cradled between his ear and shoulder as Jongin peeked his head over the entrance of the kitchen.

Kyo Jin noticed his presence before his dad did. He flailed his arms forwards and excitedly squealed "Pick me up" as if Jongin could just go there and scoop him up from his green baby highchair without his dad's permission.

"Yes, thank you. We'll be there in about half an hour." Kyungsoo hung up and put his phone onto the dining table and shushed at his son to sit still, seeming not to notice there was a figure awkwardly standing at the doorframe.

When Kyungsoo said "Ah" to coax his son to open his small mouth for the next spoon, his own didn't form a cute small ellipse shape like people's often did in dramas, but there was a huge round shape like he was trying to fit his fist into it. His already huge eyes widened as his mouth too, and he just looked weirdly hilarious instead of cute.

"Good morning, Kyungsoo." Jongin cleared his throat. Kyungsoo seemed startled at this, since he jumped a feet in the air and accidentally flung the content on the spoon onto his pajama top.

"Holy moly," Kyungsoo yelped and turned to look at Jongin with madness in his eyes. "You scared the moly out of me, you little moly. And don't you have to add '-ssi' after my name? I'm older than you after all."

Kyungsoo had an odd style of cursing that Jongin nearly had no idea what he was saying.

Before Jongin could open his mouth to say anything to reply, Kyungsoo approached him with the spoon that had Jongin flinch. But nothing came, no smack of a cooking utensil on the bicep, just Kyungsoo thrusting the spoon into his hand as he wordlessly floated pass Jongin, probably going to change his stained clothes.

Kyo Jin was giggling in his seat, eyes bright with fondness. "Appa so clumsy." There was an adorable lisp in his voice.

Jongin grinned and picked his way to sit on the chair that was still warm from Kyungsoo's body heat.

"He is, right?" Jongin spooned up the soup and carefully twirled it around like a flying motion. "So now Jongin hyung is the pilot with an airplane. Kyo Jin will show hyung the airfield, won't you?"

Kyo Jin squeaked in delight as he opened his mouth to show his tongue, and with a imitation of an airplane sound, Jongin put the spoon into the boy's mouth.

Kyungsoo came back minutes later, all dressed up in dark—dark grey socks, dark blue jeans, black sweater and black coat, the only not-blacky thing on his body was a green backpack adorned with tiny symbols of heroes that he flung over one shoulder. It seemed like he gave no care about clothes and just put on anything he found in the closet. And he looked like not bothering to comb his hair either.

"Jinni finished it all up?" Kyungsoo asked as he took a seat next to Jongin, eyeing the empty bowl and then Jongin, a skeptical look on his face.

Jongin nodded, grinning proudly.

Kyungsoo opened his mouth, but before any words came out, there was a commotion of someone barging into the house. Kyungsoo sighed, looking extremely defeated.

The voice was low, loud, and absolutely deafening at this early hour in the morning. "Do Kyungsoo," the voice boomed. "You have to thank me! I've found your handsome babysitter the most fashionable outfit that I bet costs more than all of his lost clothes combined."

Should Jongin feel offended? Yes. He jutted his lower lip out and looked at Kyungsoo, who clamped his hand onto his face and shook his head tiredly.

"Uncle Chanyeol," Kyo Jin chirped happily, alerting to the intruder where they were.

They saw the outfit before they saw Chanyeol. Jongin gulped, Kyungsoo sighed, and Kyo Jin cracked up.

"Uncle Chanyeol has a gecko costume." People often said a laugh of a child was the most beautiful sound, but one that Kyo Jin was laughing now sounded nothing more than a ridicule, even when a three-year-old didn't have any concept of mockery.

An normal-looking undershirt, _but actually it was the most expensive_ , Chanyeol informed. A hoodie with several droplets of colors from small to big sizes on a white background. A pair of skinny light pink jeans ripped at the knees. A dark blue scarf matching a pair of Converse. A pair of light purple socks. And Chanyeol even bought him a brand new purple brief.

The taller clapped Jongin's shoulder with his big hand and enough force that pushed him forwards a bit when he handed him the outfit. "Go clean up and dress up, Jonginni, you'll look great." He encouraged but it just made Jongin's stomach drop even more.

Jongin took the borrowed outfit nonetheless, since it was better than Kyungsoo's tiny clothes, but frankly refused the socks despite Chanyeol practically begging him to wear.

The combination was way too colorful to his like, but Jongin indeed looked great. Even when he had to roll up the cuffs of the jeans since Chanyeol's height was undoubtedly admirable. He chuckled to himself while admiring his reflection in the mirror. And when he stepped into the living room later to find Kyungsoo and Kyo Jin sitting on the couch, he didn't miss the lingering gaze the dad seemingly unconsciously giving him and a faint blush gracing his cheeks when he abruptly averted his eyes.

"Come on," said Kyungsoo as he rose to his feet with Kyo Jin in his arms.

"We're going somewhere?" Jongin asked uncertainly.

"Yes," Kyungsoo had already led the way to the front door, Jongin right after his heels.

"I thought you have to go to work or something?"

"I have Saturdays off to take Jinni to some entertaining places for children. But now I'm wasting a day off to take you to the police station." Kyungsoo's voice was so calm and neutral that Jongin couldn't figure out if he was upset or not. So he just tried to put all his sincerity into a small "Sorry and thank you."

~o~

Chanyeol drove them to the police station with a speech of a snail, but that was understandable, given they having a child in the car. The tallest bid them goodbye before driving off with a speech of one who attempted at suicide.

The reporting was short, since Jongin's lost possessions were mainly clothes and personal items. And his phone. And his wallet. Jongin was not sobbing in front of the police and especially not a three-year-old kid.

"Be optimistic, at least you still keep your important papers," one of the police said in her kind voice. "And underwear," she added, chuckling.

After that she told them about some other recent cases with the same patterns like Jongin's, one victim had been even left naked since his underwear was gold gilded at the waistband. That had drawn out Kyungsoo's chuckle, and somehow it sounded really ethereal to Jongin's ear.

They spent twenty minutes at the station and ten other minutes of walking with Kyo Jin holding both of their hands. Jongin couldn't help but notice the height difference of them and feel like they would perfectly fit together when they hugged. A chuckled left his mouth before Jongin found Kyungsoo opening the door to lead him into a small, cozy bakery shop. The sweet butter aroma flooded into his nostrils as the door closed with a ringing sound behind him.

Kyungsoo gestured him to take any seat he wanted and made his way to the cashier area. Jongin sat Kyo Jin and himself down at a table in front of the large window where the sun beaming its warm light through the glass and onto their light and dark skin. The boy was listing out the colors of his hoodie as Jongin looked at Kyungsoo's narrow back.

Kyungsoo had jet black hair and it looked so thick and soft compared to average male standard, and he was messing with it while talking animatedly to some cashier with black shadows around his sleepy eyes. Jongin didn't think ordering cakes would be that fierce.

Two minutes later Kyungsoo came to their table with half a dozen of employees with the same scold on their faces. They wordlessly got into position and stood around the table with twelve eyes glaring at Jongin.

The tanned boy felt prickles run down his spine, his arms reflexly wrapped around Kyo Jin, who, for some reasons, giggling cheerfully.

" _If you_ —" growled the man with shadowy eyes, his name tag Zitao.

" _Ever_ —" super tall blonde-haired Yifan pressed his word.

" _Touch_ —" Dumpling-faced Xiumin raised his fist.

" _One strand_ —" Suho looked like he was fighting a smile on his kind, handsome face.

" _Of Kyo Jin's_ —" Yixing sounded like he was trying to sell you drugs.

" _And Kyungsoo's hair_ —" Jongdae's blank face strongly implied that he wasn't interested in what he was doing.

" _We will hunt your fart box down_." They all but finished the threat in unison.

Jongin didn't know what to think as he heard a groan "Oh God, you're all embarrassing me" of Kyungsoo in the background. For some reason, Jongin did feel threatened, not because that these people were intimidating by any means, but because they were so weird to the extent that it scared him.

Jongin found himself speechless and he heard some chuckles from other guests as if this attitude of those who worked in this bakery shop was nothing out of ordinary.

Jongin turned his head around to find Kyungsoo and gave him a crying smile (or is that a cry), asking for help. He hadn't met the man for more than 24 hours and the number of Kyungsoo's sighs was more than all the sighs of eighteen years Jongin had lived through.

Kyungsoo grabbed the nape of the tallest man named Yifan and pulled his head down until he could whisper into the man's ear without having to tiptoe. His voice was supposed to be quiet, but it came out loud and clear. "Hyung, I told you guys to make sure he's suitable for the job. Now he's gonna laugh at our faces."

"Why did you apply the job though?" The guy named Jongdae suddenly asked, but still showed no interest. 

"Because I'm broke?" Jongin replied.

"The salary is low like in hell, dude," Suho winced like a rick kid talked about cheap ass.

"What's your real intention?" Xiumin, despite his baby face, had muscles cover every part of his body that made Jongin shrink further into his seat. He was supposed to be protective of Kyo Jin, now he felt the boy in his arms bigger than himself.

Jongin turned to look at Kyungsoo again, a plea on the tip of his tongue. "Can I—Can I just quit my job now?" 

That had Kyungsoo's eyes widen. "What?"

"Because I thought you took me to a bakery to eat cake, and now I'm being interrogated with an empty stomach. What if you hired me as a babysitter but the actual job behind its cover is something else entirely. These guys just look like those weird gangsters in some cheap action movies. Are you wanting me to deliver drugs?" Jongin looked paler and paler despite his tanned complexion. "Or being a toy boy, since yesterday that guy with eyeliner talked something about taking care of the dad. Does it go by the meaning daddy kink? If it's the case—" Jongin swallowed at that, the rest of the speech lost.

At this point, Zitao and Jongdae broke into a fit of laughter and clung at each other's shoulders to gain support. Yifan, Suho and Xiumin averted their eyes elsewhere as if they couldn't stand watching a hurt boy. Yixing had already left to serve other guests with his dreamy (stoned) eyes.

Kyo Jin was laughing too, even when not understanding what was going on.

Kyungsoo was supposed to be the one who raised suspicion about this guy, and now he was being doubted back. And all of this was because of his ridiculous coworkers' tactic. 

"Stop imagining things," Kyungsoo grumbled, "And fine, if you want cake, just pick up one."

His former plan was to cook kimchi spaghetti for late breakfast slash early lunch at home to save money. Now thanks to his coworkers, he had to pay for cakes of all food. Kyungsoo had never been a sweet tooth.

"You're sure they won't put coke in that brownie?"

"You watched too much drama for your own good, Jongin," Kyungsoo rolled his eyes before picking his way to make orders.

Kyungsoo watched as Jongin put a spoonful of blueberry yogurt into Kyo Jin's mouth and a handful of brownie into his own. If anything, Jongin was a messy eater. His quality to feed Kyo Jin cleanly had nothing to do with the way he fed himself. But somehow Kyungsoo found it endearing, watching him use hand picking up his food.

"You don't eat yours?" Jongin asked around a mouthful, chocolate syrup stick over all the curves of his lips.

"You can have it if you want," Kyungsoo passed his plate across the table and offered Jongin a tissue. Seeming to realize how messy he was now, Jongin took it and ducked his head while tapping the piece on his mouth, a blush blooming on his tanned skin.

"Do you still want to take Kyo Jin to the park or something?" Jongin asked, using a plastic spoon now.

Kyungsoo checked the time; he still had a couple of hours before Kyo Jin's lunch time. "There's a playground few blocks away."

"Can I go with you two?"

"Don't you have to meet your friend Sehun?"

"I doubt he'd see me without some rounds of morning—" Jongin mouthed the last word now, "—sex."

"Okay," Kyungsoo said easily. Jongin sooner or later had to get familiar with Kyo Jin's favorite places. And there was no harm tagging one more person to a children playground after all.

_How wrong he was!_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for the kudos, they really make me happy and have motivation to write!! *giggles*


	3. A pan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is short, but it's a lever for the next chapter which is quite long and in editing already. Yay me for being a labourous writer!!
> 
> And thank you for your kudos and comments, they really helped me and motivated me to continue to write when life turned rough at some points.
> 
> Anyways, enjoy the fluffy squishy story!! :):)

Jongin was good at playing with kids. And Kyo Jin easily got on well with the tanned boy too, it seemed.

But every good thing had its own flaws behinds.

One: The fact that Jongin loved playing with kids was all fine, but that Jongin also loved playing kids' equipments was worth concerning.

More than one time, the tanned boy got warned by a middle-aged security guard of the playground for climbing up the slide. And more times than Kyungsoo could count, he tried to fling himself from bar to bar of a climber that suddenly looked so small compared to his height—he even had to huddle himself so his legs wouldn't touch the ground. But that might be the only thing that Jongin could play—it looked ridiculous nonetheless.

Kyo Jin was the one who stood aside and looked up at Jongin in admiration and clapped his hands like a seal.

Kyungsoo leaned backwards on his palms, relishing in the feelings of cool soft grass against his skin. He watched Kyo Jin lead Jongin with sulky face back to where he was lounging. It was a rare warm day of the winter. Kyungsoo even had to squint his eyes against the sunlight as he looked up at his son and the babysitter, who looked like a sex god with only a thin undershirt, the hoodie being pulled off earlier due to perspiration.

And two: Girls gonna gather themself around an adorable kid and a handsome boy.

They barely reached him. A group of high school girls still in uniform approached the two when they were few feet away from Kyungsoo.

"Aw," one of the girl cooed, already bending to pinch at Kyo Jin's cheek, which Kyungsoo disliked because God knows if others' hands wouldn't affect his son's sensitive skin. "Is this your little brother? He looks so cute."

Before Kyungsoo could stand up and get his son from further touches, the girl batted her lashes at Jongin, who was inexplicably taking a step back from the girl, and laughed easily. "Like you."

Kyungsoo almost threw up at the pickup line, and the fact that that girl used his son for flirting intention made his blood boil. Or that he was getting upset because this girl was hitting on Jongin? No, absolutely not.

After that was a chant of how good looking Jongin was, how his tanned skin turned golden under sunlight, how his biceps showed his manliness when they flexed, how he looked sexy with sweat and matted hair, how kissable his lips looked when he turned to face Kyungsoo with his pouting mouth—wait, no, the last part seemed to be only on Kyungsoo's head. Fuck the sun, playing trick to his mind.

The girls kept chitchatting as if Kyungsoo just wasn't sitting right there and shooting daggers at them with his eyes. And it seemed more females gathered around them, the more Kyo Jin looked like on the verge of tears.

Kyungsoo dodged himself through the wall of girls before he reached out to his son. That was when he noticed his hands were trembling. Shit, he hadn't eaten anything for half a day and now his body was screaming for attention. He should—he needed to get home soon before his legs gave in as well.

Jongin seemed to notice this too. There was an expression of worry in his eyes that Kyungsoo somewhat found familiar, as if he had caught this look somewhere before. Jongin immediately detached himself from a hand beginning to touch his bicep to get a hold of Kyungsoo's shoulder.

"You look pale. You alright?" Jongin asked as he picked up Kyo Jin into his arms before Kyungsoo could.

"Just—" Kyungsoo puffed out a short breath. "Go home."

Jongin nodded wordlessly before bidding a polite goodbye to people around them.

"Aren't you supposed to be heading to Sehun's place now?" Kyungoo asked as they headed to the bus station nearby. At this point, he really wanted to diminish Jongin. Not that Jongin annoyed him. Perhaps he did to some extent, but again, who didn't annoy Kyungsoo? But the reason this time he wanted to be left alone was that he didn't want to embarrass himself by a hastily cooked meal and a grumble stomach, or even worse, him fainting on the street. And he had been through that situation before, Kyungsoo was not letting it happen again.

Jongin blinked at that. "You really want me to go, don't you? You asked this question twice just in one morning."

"I—" Kyungsoo trailed off. For some reason, Jongin did look hurt. And for some other reason—probably that Kyungsoo see the hurt look in the taller's eyes, Kyungsoo found the need to explain himself—something that he never did to anyone before. "Just thought he would be worried."

"Sehun's fine. Even if he didn't hear anything of me for months, he'd still know that I'm fine. I've managed to be fine for all my life."

"You're giving more information than necessary again, Jongin."

"I know," Jongin somehow seemed frustrated. "But I'm trying to tell you that even a boy like me can take care of myself, and you, a father yourself, don't seem to know how to do it. If you think that only Kyo Jin needs to be healthy, you're wrong. Because if you get down with an ill, who will—"

"Who are you to judge me?" Kyungsoo yelled. He had had enough. He was tired, and hungry, and being preached by someone who knew nothing about him didn't help, at all. And the fact that Kyo Jin began to look confused at his father raising voice and his lower lips trembled made Kyungsoo just want to get home now. "And as I recall, you're the one who ate my cake earlier." Kyungsoo knew he was unreasonable because he was the one offering, but he didn't fucking care at this point. Being taught about how to be a parent by just a greenish boy shook him to the core.

"I—" There was a hesitance in Jongin's voice, and after that there was a look that gave Kyungsoo an impression that maybe Jongin did know him. A look of someone that had been knowing him for longer than he thought. Jongin just shook his head. "Right. It's just—"

"No. You don't have to explain yourself. Just leave." He said, deadpan, and took Kyo Jin to his arms from Jongin. At Jongin's panicked and widened eyes, he added. "And come back at half pass six tomorrow. I'll go to work at seven, so please be punctual."

When the bus came, Jongin wordlessly got on it with them. Kyungsoo just thought Sehun's place was in the same direction with his and took a window seat. Jongin sat next to him, occasionally nudging his knee with his own one to get Kyungsoo's attention, but he ignored him.

Jongin got off the bus with them.

Kyungsoo gave him a sided glance as he walked up to his house some blocks away. "Why are you still following us?"

"Do you have chicken at home?" was all Jongin replied instead of an answer.

"What?"

"I just learned a really cool recipe on the television yesterday. I could cook for you since it looks like even walking is difficult for you right now."

There had never been someone offer to cook for Kyungsoo before. He was truly moved. But only for a second.

"According to the contract, I only supply one meal per day," Kyungsoo tried to reason, but he himself found it weak. And Kyo Jin just mumbled to his ear that "Jinni want chicken". Fuck.

"Just deduct from the salary," Jongin said bluntly as he helped Kyungsoo hold Kyo Jin as the shorter found his keys to the house.

~o~

Despite Kyo Jin refusing to eat soup because he wanted the chicken, Kyungsoo found the need to feed him his appropriate and nutritious meal first nonetheless. As he fed Kyo Jin, he stole some glances at the tanned boy. Jongin was seasoning all the stuff into a large bowl without even measuring. At some points, Jongin ruffled his light brown hair out of frustration, clearly not knowing what to do. And Kyungsoo was absolutely sure that Jongin didn't remember a thing from the recipe he had seen. Kyungsoo already regretted his decision to let him cook.

"That's not a pan for frying, Jongin," Kyungsoo informed him as Jongin took out a shallow pan.

"Trust me on this one, Kyungsoo-sii." Jongin waved him off, turning on the gas. "I know what I am doing."

"What the world is this?" Kyungsoo stared skeptically at the thing in front of him an hour later—it would take you a lot of time to fry something in a way too shallow pan, really. The thing looked half like fried chicken, half like chicken sauce, half like just fresh chicken. Kyungsoo wondered how it was even possible.

Jongin grinned at him, gesturing with a nod of his chin for Kyungsoo to take a bite.

"So," Jongin drawled the word, looking at him in anticipation from across the dining table. "How was it?"

"I don't know how you've managed to be fine your whole life as you said. But this is gross as fuck," Kyungsoo even wasn't able to control his profane. His face wrinkled in disgust as he tried to spit out the morsel. Really. Say him rude and ungrateful, but this chicken should be banned in 195 countries in the world. And Kyungsoo felt like he had just thrown four pounds of fresh chicken into a trash bin.

"You are too picky," Jongin whined. "It can't be that bad. Just give Kyo Jin a bite and hear what him say about it. Children don't lie."

"No shit. Jinni will not eat this." Kyungsoo pushed the plate away before Kyo Jin could reach for it.

Jongin huffed and crossed his arms, turning his face away in a sulky manner.

"Really, Jongin? Or are you trying to get revenge on me because I got angry at you earlier?"

This made Jongin jerk his head back to look at him right away. "No," he screeched. "Why would I do that? I didn't even know you were mad at me until now that you say it. I just thought you were tired and hungry so you don't want to face anyone and yelled to relieve stress."

Kyungsoo opened his mouth in mild surprise. He didn't know that Kyungsoo had been so upset and offended earlier?

"Just—" Kyungsoo sighed. He didn't know what to reply. "Just take an eye on Kyo Jin. I'll fix us something to eat."

"What about the chicken?" Jongin asked, voice cracking.

"Wrap it up and bring it to Sehun and his boyfriend Luhan to see if they will praise your talent or kill you." Kyungsoo's words were harsh, but his voice teasing. He got a brief glance and saw that Jongin was pouting and smiling at the same time. Stupid idiot.

"You trouble," Kyungsoo scoffed as he scrubbed at the pan. "Thanks to your stupid cooking, now I have to wash the pan to cook my own food."

Kyungsoo was such a grouch. But he looked adorable when he grizzled.

"This is the second best thing that I've ever tasted," Jongin spoke around a mouthful of kimchi spaghetti.

Out of boredom and just a little bit curiosity, Kyungsoo asked, "So what is the best?"

Jongin halted at his track of bringing more food into his mouth and looked up at Kyungsoo, who had finished his dish. Not that he ate fast, but Jongin just helped himself a second dish.

"You want to hear about it?" Jongin looked troubled.

"Sure," Kyungsoo nodded as he pushed a stray lock of hair out of Kyo Jin's forehead. The boy was deeply asleep in his arms. He had had an exciting yet exhausting morning at the playground. "Why did you ask that though?"

"Because I'm afraid I'd give too much information again, and that you don't want to hear." Jongin ducked his head to look at the unfinished food, fork twirling the spaghetti.

Something in Kyungsoo's stomach dropped, and he felt guilty. He cleared his throat and schooled his expression. "This time I ask you to tell, so that means I want to listen to you. So do tell." Kyungsoo felt strange came back to the polite boy he once had been few years ago when his parents had been still there to teach him how to be a gentleman.

"So, uh," Jongin spoke up after a stretched moment. "There had been a woman who adopted me before. I really loved her, I still do, so I called her Omoni. Omoni was a wealthy widowed woman. She inherited a lot from her husband but she had no children. After some time she felt lonely so she adopted me when I was twelve. She cooked the best seaweed soup." Jongin finished his story with a small and sad smile, eyes fixing at a point absently.

Kyungsoo just hummed to show that he was listening until he noticed something. "You used past tense. What happened?"

Jongin's eyes were a bit red at the edges. "Things all stumbled down when ajumma lost all after a risky investment. We lived on raw rice and water. She said sorry to me all the time but I couldn't find it in myself to think any of that was her fault. You know how people are when they lose everything they had? That was how she broke down and couldn't get up to her feet again. She was down to skin and bones. And she got down with a flu. It couldn't kill a person, but her physics at that time was bad enough. She refused to eat just so I could have more to myself. After that I knew she had been trying to save a little left of money, just so she could—" Jongin choked, palms flinging up to hide his watery eyes. Kyungsoo felt something stuck in his throat. "It was my fourteenth birthday that I ate her seaweed soup the last time."

"I'm sorry," Kyungsoo reached out his hand to touch Jongin's one, but he retreated it halfway. They were not that close after all. But he did feel like he should comfort Jongin, he just didn't know how to.

Jongin shook his head, using the back if his hands to wipe off the tears flowing out of his eyes, and forced a smile. "I didn't mean to be this sensitive and emotional. It's just—It's the first time I tell someone about this."

Kyungsoo found his eyes widen in surprise. "No one else before?"

"Yeah," Jongin's smile was more genuine now. "I just didn't have enough courage to recall it out loud before. And crying in front of anyone is just plainly embarrassing."

"Are you embarrassed now?"

Jongin choked out a laugh. "No. I'm feeling relieved now."

Kyungsoo didn't know how to reply to that, again.

"Uhm, is that why you scolded me for skipping meal earlier?"

Jongin looked into his eyes then. He nodded slowly. There was something more to it, but Kyungsoo thought he shouldn't dwell into it if Jongin didn't want to.

They ended up bidding goodbye after Kyungsoo took Kyo Jin to his crib and Jongin washed the dishes.

"So I will come back tomorrow?" Jongin asked as they stood on the threshold, hands stuffed into Chanyeol's colorful hoodie's pockets.

"It's your job. Don't ask stupid questions like that." Kyungsoo rolled his eyes, but his voice teasing.

Jongin smiled at him and seemed to be out his fucking mind that he withdrew his hands from the pockets to pull Kyungsoo into his arms and hugged him so tight that he felt the air knocked out of his lungs.

"Thank you for hiring me," Jongin squeaked against the top of his head. Before Kyungsoo could punch him in the guts Jongin had already pulled himself back and hastily ran down towards the sweet, not daring look at him again.

Kyungsoo watched him go, all bouncing hair and clumsy feet, and felt his face still warm from the heat of Jongin's chest and the beats of Jongin's heart. Was that Kyungsoo was suffering from arrhythmia now?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tell me what you think about this chapter, alright? Your words are my biggest motivation :) Thank you for reading!!


	4. A box of ice cream

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't have much to say lol, save many thanks for your kudos and love for this story. So enjoy the new chap, fellows!!! <3
> 
> Small note: There's a flashback that I put between "..." I hope you guys won't get confused on that part :")

There were certain things that Jongin wished extinct. The very first thing was his best friend. And the very second thing was his best friend's boyfriend. And the last thing was their stupid couple hair dye. As if they hadn't looked the same enough. And now they became double annoying.

"So have you lost your virginity with your crush yet?" was the first thing Jongin was greeted with when the door opened to reveal Luhan, who had his new hair color.

"I—what?"

"That penguin looking boy," Luhan clicked his tongue, tall skinny body leaning against the narrow doorframe to the equally small flat.

Jongin sputtered a bit at that and squinted at the pink-haired boy suspiciously. "How did you know about him? Sehun would never say a word. Because he just doesn't care. At all. I doubt he even remembered what I said."

Luhan just gave him a smile, which never meant any good.

"Sehun, I swear to God I will shave your stupid hair and I—" Jongin howled, hoping that said motherfucker could hear him from inside.

"So that's true? That you have a crush on a daddy? I didn't know you're into all that kinky." Luhan cut him off and smirked his handsome smirk. Jongin wondered why someone with that look of a deer could have a mind of a deer hunter. And Jongin hated it. Luhan's tone was low this time. "You know Sehun would spill everything when he got really high on se—"

"Stop," Jongin groaned. "I don't want to know about others' sexual activity like you, you nosey mops. Now let me in, I need to take a shower."

There came Sehun. Droplets of water fell from his damp pink hair onto his shoulders then his upper part, waist wrapped by a tiny towel that hardly covered anything. His face was blank when he regarded Jongin through his emotionless eyes. Jongin just wanted to kick him so bad, for revealing his secret to the most annoying human being.

"Remember you're the guest here, Jonginnie," Sehun snorted, wrapping his arms around Luhan with his chin on the other's shoulder. Could they stop that clingy thing? "We can send you away as soon as we want."

There was nothing Jongin could do but groan in defeat, so he did so. After messing up his hair to show his frustration, he calmed himself down because _Yes, he needed them to shelter him_. Or else he would have just said _Fuck you_ and raised his middle finger for effect and left his ass out of this building for the rest of his life.

"I'm bringing fried chicken. So let me in, okay?" He bargained, wriggling the bag of fried chicken before his friends' hungry eyes.

Luhan took the bag with a small squeal of joy before dragging his boyfriend to the living room with the cuddle couch.

When Jongin was taking a smokey hot shower, he heard faintly someone cursed him about how gross and poisonous the chicken was. He was even promised to be doomed in hell once he got out of the bathroom, but Jongin ignored it. He was too busy relishing in the heat of the water running from his scalp to his toes, the scent of shampoo waffing over his nosils, and the tingling warm inside his chest where he had pressed flushed against Kyungsoo.

"I swear to God, Jongin. You should—No, you _have to_ stop your stupid crush on this Kyungsoo guy," Luhan fussed right after Jongin entered the living room. "He cooked the most disgusting fried chicken I've ever tasted. And I tasted your food before, so that says something."

Jongin just rolled his eyes so hard it hurt as he plopped down onto the sofa. Lucky for him that Sehun still kept some of his clothes since he dropped by quite offten before, but they had almost been worn out with tiny holes at some places. God, as if he wasn't poor enough, now he had to spend money on clothes, again.

"So he recognized you?" Sehun asked after taking several sips of Luhan's hand-made bubble tea to get rid of the awful taste from the chicken.

"How could him? And I pretended not to know him either because we had never actually met before. It was just—"

"Oh I forgot," Sehun interrupted him. "It was just you silently watching him from the afar since that day you saw him at the orphanage, how much long? Two years ago. You're pathetic."

They were both laughing now, at Jongin's dumb face and his pining. Why of all people he got these friends?

"I am not pathetic. I'm romantic," Jongin defended himself. "As all I know, all the main characters from drama got the love of their life after decades of silently watching their desired other."

"What's the romance in it?" Luhan leaned towards him to pad him, strongly, on his back, still laughing. "You even pretended not to know him before so he didn't know you're such a perverse stalker."

Jongin was not perverse. Or a stalker.

...He just often took a walk when he got free time when he was still in his orphanage. Sometimes he dropped by Sehun's because they were best friends since they studied at secondary school together when he still lived with Ajumma. Sometimes he went to some flat shops to see if there was something cheap but interesting so he could give those kids he lived with in the orphanage on their birthdays. Sometimes he just went to some dancing club that didn't require membership to be allowed to dance with others.

Until he saw him. A short, skinny, pale, wide-eyed boy trying to take back a baby from a woman's arms, begging her to keep the baby, begging her to let him keep the baby because he was the one that had begged for this baby boy to be born before. And because of that he was the baby's father. Jongin hadn't understood it before, but he did now. 

Jongin remembered his name was Kyungsoo when his mother shouted at him to stop making a scene.

Jongin remembered the way his tears pouring out of his eyes which were dull and swollen and red around the edges when his father held him still when his mother filled in the papers.

And Jongin remembered the brilliant light in those eyes of the baby when the caretaker held out the boy to him to look, and how warm those small, soft fingers wrapped around his finger when Jongin eagerly tried to poke at the pink cheek. Jongin remembered a couple of nights when he held the baby in his arms when he hiccuped and sniffled, the way the boy snuggled his face against Jongin's chest and subsided gradually to sleep. Until one day the shortie Kyungsoo came back. His face lost its color, but his eyes were bright. Jongin realized Kyungsoo and the baby had those same sparkles in their eyes. Kyungsoo took the baby away—took the baby back to where—and to who—he belonged with.

Jongin had been sad, because being apart from something—or someone—was never an easy thing. But he was happy, and somehow alive with a hope that someday he would see them again. Being a sixteen-year-old, Jongin believed that he knew what love was, what love felt like, for the baby that he had been so close with even for only a couple days, and what falling in love felt like for the boy with dark hair and thick eyebrows and heart-shaped lips that he only saw from the afar for a couple times.

Jongin admitted that he watched way too much drama, but he knew for sure that his feelings were ones in reality. Call him a cheesy nerd, but he indeed struck in love at the first sight. He even dedicated himself to believe that that was an undying love. Jongin could be this hilarious, one might see!

And since then, he still came to Sehun's place where he walked in on him and a lanky blonde hair named Luhan making out on the floor, or visited those shops that the owners had gotten so accustomed to him that they often sold things for him half price, or those dancing clubs that had looked forward to having him danced everyday. And every time he went to those places, he blamed his legs for taking other journeys even when they were longer, just so he could go pass by the small house of Do Kyungsoo. He had sneakily got the address via the resister papers of the baby boy before he left.

And one day, Jongin got the chance to bump into Kyungsoo.

Jongin caught the sight of the shorter boy at the supermarket on a Saturday morning. Normally it would be the caretakers taking turn to go to the supermarket to buy groceries for the whole week, but since there was a flu spreading and some of the kids got down with the flu so the need of caretakers staying at the orphanage must be the priority. Jongin at that time was seventeen and be old enough for them to entrust him to buy groceries. Okay, actually he begged them to let him go out to do the buying just so he had chances to pass by Kyungsoo's place or even see him, and they adored Jongin enough to say _'Yes, you can go, but be back soon and don't stop halfway to eat fried chicken'_.

Jongin saw Kyungsoo stand outside the supermarket, hands gripping the handlebar of the baby stroller where his son was sleeping in, grocery bags lying haphazardly around his feet on the ground. It seemed like Kyungsoo had dropped them. He looked paler than he already was, and shaky. His eyes were dull and unfocused. Kyungsoo didn't even realize Jongin approach him until he was right in front of him.

"You alright?" Jongin asked, his hands itching to reach out to get a hold of Kyungsoo's trembling body.

Kyungsoo just shook his head—Jongin wasn't sure if that implied he was fine or not. But when one of his hands left the handlebar, he lost his balance. Before Jongin could react, Kyungsoo had fallen onto his butt, sweat covering his forehead.

Jongin knew what caused these symptoms, because his lated adopted mother had experienced it so many times before. A hypoglycemia attack.

There had to be something, anything. Instead of helping Kyungsoo get on his feet, Jongin began to ransacking the bags. Bingo. A cotton box of fruit juice and a box of cereal.

Jongin poured a small amount of cereal onto his palm and reached out to grab Kyungsoo's chin and forced his mouth to open.

"What are you—" Kyungsoo whined as Jongin pushed the cereal into his mouth.

"Eat it," Jongin urged as he opened the fruit juice box.

Kyungsoo grudgingly crunched the food in his mouth before Jongin put the strap of the juice between his full lips and hurried him to drink. Kyungsoo finished sipping with a scold on his face, thick brows burrowing.

"This combination is horrible," Kyungsoo indicated the cereal and the juice, which Jongin couldn't agree more. His eyes still looked blurry as they regarded Jongin through the lashes. The next five or so minutes was of Kyungsoo just breathing in and out and Jongin kneeling awkwardly besides him.

"Could you catch me a cab?" Kyungsoo spoke up as he rose to his feet with the support of Jongin's arms.

He helped Kyungsoo fold the stroller as the driver helped him put the grocery bags into the backseat. When Kyungsoo got himself with Kyo Jin in his arms into the passenger seat, he mumbled a small _'Thanks'_ but did not look at Jongin, cheeks flaming red with something he couldn't quite place. Anger? Holy shit, Jongin hadn't known that forcing Kyungsoo to eat cereal and fruit juice could make the shorter be this upset.

He lived on nerves since that day for months until he saw the job ads on the newspaper. It was a lucky coincidence, really, because Jongin had never been a person fond of reading news much less newspaper.

It just took a few weeks and a lot of tearful goodbyes to the kids and the caretakers before Jongin found himself with all of his few possessions wandering the street purposely until he reached the house that had been so familiar to his eyes.

Jongin smiled to himself before being blind folded by a pair of hands that smelled of smoke and a soft thing like a handkerchief stuffing onto his nose. After that was blankness until he forced his eyes open to find himself lying on the ground in a dark alley with only his yellow brief.

Jongin was now standing at Kyungsoo's threshold and staring into the hall through the open door. He decided that he should knock. But what the point of knocking the open door? After a moment of considering, he leaned over to grab at the doorknob before pulling it to close the door. Now he had an excuse to knock properly.

One. Two. Three.

Okay, maybe he should just barge in. And he did just so.

The misfortune of being robbed was totally forgotten and subsided into a glee of reunion the moment Jongin saw the baby again, sleeping tightly on the bouncer. He had grown up, not so much, but he did look healthier and his hair longer and thicker too. And his cheeks, those squishy cheeks doubtlessly inherited from Kyungsoo, make Jongin's itchy hands desire to touch. And he did just so. Until the warm voice that Jongin had craved in his heart yelled—no, not just yelled—cursed at him. Jongin had never been more sated...

"Earth to Jongin," Luhan snapped his fingers in front of Jongin's face. The tanned boy startled out of his reverie and looked at pink haired couple with with an inane smile.

"I need sleep," he declared, rather still in the haze of his own reverie. "I have to be present early tomorrow."

"It's only noon," Sehun said matter-of- factly.

"So goodbye." Jongin ignored the statement and made his way to the small negligently-furnished bedroom. He looked back abruptly after three long strides with a plea in his eyes. "And please keep your moans down."

~o~

Over those next days was Jongin doing his work of a babysitter. It was what he was good at, and that who he was taking care of was Kyo Jin just made it better. And he had excuses to meet Kyungsoo more.

Every morning at the exact seven o'clock Kyung would leave the house, but not before giving Jongin a glare that said _'I'm watching you'_. And before that Kyungsoo would even give him money so Jongin could afford to take Kyo Jin to the bakery where he worked if the baby missed his dad more than Jongin could deal with. The amount of money was exactly enough for him to catch a bus, never less or more. And every time they were in the shop, those coworkers of Kyungsoo would either glare or smirk at him, which Jongin still wondered why they had to be that weird.

At lunchtime, Jongin would pick up a note sticking on the fridge door and follow _every_ instruction to cook for Kyo Jin that Kyungsoo had written down. At first Kyo Jin refused the food, but after that he was less picky, or just that he got used to the not-so-good taste. But Jongin would like to believe that his cooking got better.

On the first day at work, Jongin gave himself a permission to rummage Kyungsoo way too small fridge (he was familiar with a much bigger fridge when living at the orphanage) to fix himself something to eat. But before he could decide whether he would cook fried chicken again or just make a simple kimchi ramen which he had mastered, Kyungsoo barged into the house. The already frantic look on his face turned into panicked one once he saw Jongin hold the chicken's wings.

"I swear to God, Kim Jongin," Kyungsoo hissed as his son gleefully ran to him and hugged his leg. "If you ever touch fresh chicken again, I will fire you."

After that was Kyungsoo cooking for both of them, and left the house hastily right after swallowing the last morsel and giving Kyo Jin a kiss on his mushroom hair.

Jongin pondered on getting himself a new phone instead of waiting for the police to catch the robbers, so that Kyungsoo would never have to go all the way back to home in these kinds of situation. But money was another story.

The days after that was Jongin opening the fridge to find a box of food that Kyungsoo had cooked for him, but the notes about what Kyo Jin would eat today still showed up on the fridge door. Kyungsoo would never let Kyo Jin eat food that had been cooked for over two hours.

Kyo Jin was generally a quiet kid, but he would get hyper at some points, which ended up Jongin impersonating heros with table cloth wrapped around his neck and Kyo Jin running after him, laughing like maniac. At other points they would take out all the toys that Kyungsoo stored in a basket and throw them all over the floor, and then Jongin would build up an imaginary family with some squishy toys like a bunny, a penguin and a teddy bear. And then they would grab all the blankets they would find in the house (and there were a lot) and put up a tent. Not long after that was Kyo Jin taking a nap on his arm in the tent instead of in his crib.

At dawn, Kyungsoo would come back home and see the battlefield, and Jongin would be scolded with a pout on his face while Kyo Jin hid his giggles behind his small hands. Kyungsoo would dismiss him after making sure Jongin put everything back to their original order.

~o~

Jongin wandered the streets and wondered if Luhan and Sehun would eat dinner with him or would eat each other instead when he caught sight of an old man with sorrow face. He sat inside a small, shabby ice cream shop with an equally shabby sign **Soo Man Iscream Shop**. Poor the old man, no one would eat ice cream in this weather.

Jongin made his way inside the shop and sat on one of the chairs that creaked once his butt hit the surface.

The old man swirled from the ice cream display counter and looked at Jongin with a jubilant expression.

"What flavor do you want, son?" His voice was a bit hoarse—perhaps due to eating too much ice cream—but warm in this chilly air.

Jongin scratched his neck bashfully, "Hm, I don't bring any money here," he lied because actually he had no money anywhere at all. "So I just thought I could come in here to make you company."

The old man gave him a look through his glasses that said _'Are you for real?'_. The shop was slow and he was just too gloomy to deal with a weird boy. But before he could ask Jongin to depart, some high school students entered the shop, stealing glances at the boy and whispering into each other's ears how good-looking he was. Despite the old age, Soo Man's hearing hadn't lost completely. After that was wave after wave of females, or even some boys, picking their way inside the small shop to buy ice cream.

Being an old man, he couldn't serve the customers really fast while the shop was so crowded. But they seemed not to mind as they were busy glancing—or openly stare—at the boy. Perhaps this boy was a makeki neko.

Jongin saw the old man struggle with work and decided that at least he could do something. He approached the ice cream counter and offered to help the shop owner. The old man was smiling now, nodding as patting his shoulder. Jongin didn't know why but he had the feeling of being watched.

An hour later the old man and Jongin had to say sorry to the customers because they had ran out of ice cream. The old man looked brighten now, and was grinning at Jongin oddly.

"Are you finding a job, son?" The old man asked. "You can work here for me and be paid a commission."

Jongin was surprised. "Really? You mean you are hiring me just like that?"

"So you don't like it?" The old man was frowning now.

Jongin pondered if he should take another part-time job. Considering he had lost all of his saved money, plus he didn't want to count on Sehun too much, he nodded. "I want the job. But—But I can only work at time like today, and I need Saturdays off. Is this alright?"

The old man's eyebrows furrowed a bit, but he relaxed after a sonic moment before nodding. "Alright," he cleared his throat and added. "But tomorrow please wear something with less holes."

~o~

"Do you have any ice cream left, Soo Man ahjussi?" Jongin spoke up as they finished cleaning all the ice cream pans and about to close the shop.

"No, I don't, that's why we closed the shop," the man snorted, wiping the last stain on the glass of the counter.

Jongin looked at him suspiciously. "Ahjussi, we all know you still keep some ice cream, your voice is of someone who eat ice cream every night. One of the the caretakers I knew before had this voice after breaking up with her boyfriend."

The man gave up not long after that and now Jongin found himself standing at the front door of Kyungsoo's house, knocking at the wooden surface.

When Kyungsoo opened the door, Jongin couldn't help a hitch in his breath at how the shorter was looking. He was wearing round glasses. They made his doe eyes much wider when he saw Jongin.

"Hi Kyungsoo—" Jongin cleared his throat and added when he saw Kyungsoo narrow his eyes. "—sii."

"What do you want?" Kyungsoo asked, still not showing any sign that he would let Jongin in.

"I just wondered if you wanted to eat some ice cream," Jongin held out the bag with an ice cream box.

Kyungsoo regarded him for a moment before he took the bag, their fingers touching. Kyungsoo's skin was warm.

"Thanks," Kyungsoo said. And closed the door. In his face.

Jongin was bewildered. He knocked again.

"What?" Kyungsoo seemed much annoyed when he opened the door this time.

"With me," Jongin said hastily. "I mean do you want to eat ice cream with me?"

"You moron," said Kyungsoo, rolling his eyes. But he allowed Jongin in nonetheless.

Kyo Jin was sleeping on his bouncer. It was already over ten. There was a laptop on the table coffee. Kyungsoo must have been doing his translation job.

They ended up sitting on the couch with the ice cream box between them, watching Billy Elliot with a shared set of ear buds. Their fingers would brush then and there when they dug their plastic spoons into the box, but none of them seemed to mind. But not that Jongin didn't notice a light pink blush gracing over Kyungsoo's cheeks.

Jongin got back to Sehun's place around midnight, noiselessly and swiftly picking his way to the bedroom before he could be interrogated by his nosey friends about why he got home this late. He would say exactly what he had done, but they would not believe it and make up another whole story.

Even after brushing his teeth, Jongin could still the tase of sweetness on his tongue when he closed his eyes. 

Jongin wondered if life could be more beautiful?


	5. A fair

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is short. I'm sorry for that, and I'm sorry for another thing, too.  
> Now enjoy!

"Kyungsoo-sii, there's a fair at the park tonight, will you and Kyo Jin come?"

Kyungsoo perhaps did not notice it when it all started, but he did realize that he had been anticipating everyday of Jongin showing up at his door at exactly half past six o'clock, or of Jongin lounging on his couch with a box of ice cream—"new flavor everyday," the tanned boy said—and watching his TV, or watching his laptop's screen, or just simply watching Kyungsoo working on his translation and laughing quietly at some kissing scenes in the novels. 

But he was sure he had not expected to see Jongin at his front door on a Saturday morning, since Jongin would always sleep in on Saturdays as he had unnecessarily informed Kyungsoo as usual.

"There'll be a lot of food, and games, and kids," Jongin was ranting his mouth off again. "And Kyo Jin will definitely love it."

For some reason, Kyungsoo nodded. They parted with the location, the time, like a plan—like a _date_.

~o~

"You are NOT going on a motherfucker date with that god damn outfit," Baekhyun was giving him that disgusted look. Chanyeol nodded in agreement.

Lucky for him that Kyo Jin was going shopping with Suho and Yixing, or else Kyungsoo would cut Baekhyun's tongue for throwing curse words at his house. About Suho, the older always had a strange hobby of buying clothes for Kyo Jin. Probably he had way too much money and just wanted to have Kyo Jin as a third wheel—and a distraction—because he could not have a date with Yixing alone without weirding himself out.

"It's _not_ a date," Kyungsoo shook his head, wrapping a grey woolen scarf around his neck. And he was always totally content with what he wore. Dark colors suited him well, and didn't make him stand out.

"It's not a date," Baekhyun mimicked him with that excessively dramatical movement of his lips, which Kyungsoo hated. "Bullshit."

Before Kyungsoo could snarl at him, Baekhyun had already raked out his closet and thrown all his clothes carelessly onto the floor. He did not know how much neatly and orderly Kyungsoo had folded his clothes.

"Chanyeol and I gave you this outfit on your nineteenth birthday, why is it still having a price tag on?" Baekhyun flung the item at him.

"This is too bright," Kyusngoo reasoned, quite convincing to his ears. It was a sweater with a light pink color, and a pair of jeans with a light blue color. Kyungsoo could not even call the colors their right name. "And who keeps the price tag on the present?"

"Because this shit was expensive and we wanted you to know that," Baekhyun snapped. "And fuck if it's too bright, that hot dude Jongin gonna loveee it." He drawled the word _'love,_ that made Kyungsoo shudder, not because of the idea of it, but of Baekhyun's slutty voice.

"Who cares about Jongin?" Kyungsoo grimaced but couldn't help feeling warm in his cheeks.

"You care," Chanyeol spoke up from where he lay on the bed—Kyungsoo's bed. "You told me last night that you worried Jongin would die from his own cooked food."

"Oh," Baekhyun feigned the hurt look. "Oh, so you confided in that giant instead of me."

"I did because I thought he could keep his mouth better than you. And I was wrong," Kyungsoo hissed. "Now shut up."

"We won't shut up unless you change that tedious rags."

Kyungsoo growled but he got to change the outfit nonetheless, with only a tiny part of him hoped that Jongin would _loveee_ it.

~o~

"Sehun, can I borrow your denim jacket?" Jongin asked, peeking his head over the doorframe of Sehun's bedroom.

"Why?" Sehun asked, even not bothering looking up at him from his Playstation.

"I have a date," Jongin mumbled. That had Sehun raise an eyebrow. Luhan suppressed his smirk.

"That daddy Kyungsoo won't care what you wear," Sehun sighed.

"Oh, come on," Jongin whined, then added. "Please!"

"That will be 30,000 won per day," Sehun said casually.

Jongin jutted his lower lip out. "Your jacket costs only 20,000 won."

"You want it or not?" Sehun snorted.

Luhan chuckled from where he cuddled next to Sehun. Did they not have anything else to do? Those needy sluts.

"Just give him the jacket, love," Luhan said. It was awfully scary to see Luhan act all nice and generous. It never meant any good. "The sooner our Jonginnie succeeds in picking that penguin boy up, the sooner he leaves our place."

Jongin was proved to be right.

"It's not what I'm gonna do," Jongin shook his head frantically. "I just want to get to know him and we will fall in love with each other and—"

"We don't care," Sehun cut him off. "Luhan's right. Just take the jacket and go on your innocent date."

~o~

Jongin was late fourteen minutes. Kyungsoo stamped his feet on the ground impatiently, and Kyo Jin was beginning to complain about getting weary legs.

"Just one more minute and I will just go home," Kyungsoo murmured under his breath, a scold on his face, which was not out of ordinary. But again, what was the point of all this nice and bright outfit? Bullshit. Jongin perhaps wouldn't come, because he had probably weighted spending his free time on something else better or with Kyungsoo—a lame single dad, and changed his mind.

Another minute. And another five minutes. Jongin was still nowhere to be seen. _That dick_ , Kyungsoo cursed in his head as he squeezed Kyo Jin's hand and turned to go.

Fuck the park. Fuck the fair. Fuck this outfit. Fuck Jongin and his motherfucker invitation and his double-lidded eyes and his high-boned cheeks and the cute slope on his nose and the curves of his lips and his defined jaw and his—

"Hey," a voice that had become familiar recently called him, along with a hand on his shoulder.

Kyungsoo twirled back to look at him. At Jongin. All handsome, and light blue denim, and dark pink hair. He was attracting all the eyes now, including Kyungsoo's.

"What on earth took you so long?" Kyungsoo grumbled quite loudly, giving the taller a glare.

"Jongin hyung has girly hair," Kyo Jin squeaked, pouncing on his feet until Jongin picked him up onto his arms.

"Sorry, Kyungsoo-sii. Luhan prisoned me at home until he finished dying my hair," Jongin explained, giving him an apologetic smile. At Kyungsoo's silence, he whispered something that the shorter could not catch because the park was getting more and more crowded every second passing by.

"What do you say?" Kyungsoo almost shouted, leaning forwards a little.

"You look really handsome in bright colors," Jongin leaned in too. His whisper was breathed straight onto Kyungsoo's neck, the tip of his nose brushing his earlobe. Kyungsoo jerked away instantly, feeling flushed all over. Why suddenly it felt so hot?

"Don't get that close to me like this," Kyungsoo snapped, face burning. They had only known each other for a couple weeks, and no one had ever intruded his personal space like this since years ago. "It's not appropriate."

Jongin seemed strartled, and involuntarily backed away a step.

"Balloon, Jongin hyung," Kyo Jin bounced in his arms, tugging at his jacket as he screamed enthusiastically. If anything, his son was always the one breaking the ice.

"So, uh, should we go inside?" Jongin tilted his head toward the entrance's direction and gave the shorter an awkward smile. "They will sell out all the spicy fried chicken if we hesitate."

"Oh God," Kyungsoo groaned and laughed at that. All the anger of being made to wait was forgotten by Jongin's ridiculous addiction to fried chicken.

It was the first time Jongin saw him laughing. He decided that he liked—he loved the sight, and Kyungsoo's bright outfit.

~o~

After they finished their fried chicken with Kyungsoo sharing half of his portion to Jongin, feeding Kyo Jin with two apple pies, they found themself at a shooting booth.

Kyo Jin pointed repeatedly at a huge brown teddy bear, thrashing in Jongin's arms. "Appa, that cute bear."

"No, Jinni," Kyungsoo shook his head lightly and lowered his son's small hand down. "We'll never shoot the target."

Jongin passed Kyo Jin to Kyungsoo and pulled out some money from his pocket.

"Watch me, Kyungsoo-sii," said Jongin, wriggling his eyebrows in confidence. "I'll get Kyo Jin that giant beast."

Kyungsoo just rolled his eyes. No one could ever shoot that moving target. People designed those kind of games in a way that the players were bound to be losers.

"Shit, it was close," Jongin cursed after twelve shots in total. It was the first time Kyungsoo heard him curse. Jongin looked tattered, his dark pink hair ruffled due to hands running through frustratedly, his lips more and more jutting out of his mouth. He looked cute like a child. For a split second, Kyungsoo wanted to pinch his cheeks. He slapped himself innerly for that stupid thought.

"Jongin, stop," Kyungsoo took a hold of his forearm before Jongin could pulled more money out of his pocket. "You're draining your money on it. It's just a waste."

"But—"

"The amount of money you have spent on this is enough to buy a whole new teddy bear," Kyungsoo reasoned and urged, "Now let's go."

"Appaaaaa..."

"Kyungsoo-ssiiiii..."

If you described what Kyo Jin emitted was a whine, you could describe what Jongin emitted was a howl. And Kyungsoo was experiencing second-handed embarrassment when passerby sent judgemental looks at them.

"Fine," Kyungsoo snarled at the taller before landing Kyo Jin onto his feet. The boy immediately grabbed at Jongin's hand when his father made his way to the front of the booth.

"Give me that stupid gun," Kyungsoo snapped at the booth owner whose hands shook a bit in fear when taking the bill of money from Kyungsoo.

Kyungsoo took aim at the target that was moving so fast Jongin could not see it now. And he pulled the trigger. There was a puff sound when the plastic bullet shot through the plastic film that was in the middle of the target.

"Holy macaroni," Jongin squeaked, lunging himself towards the shorter. He shook Jongin's shoulders like a mad man. "You did it, Kyungsoo. You freaking did it." Jongin even forgot using honorific. "You shot that god damn target."

Kyungsoo mumbled "You should stop using profanity!" as Jongin gleefully flung his long arm over Kyungsoo's shoulders.

"Here you are!" the booth onwer gave Jongin the giant bear with a bitter, crooked smile. Jongin hugged the stuffed animal like his dear life.

"Jongin," Kyungsoo called him, voice strangely dropping an octave.

Jongin tried to peek his head over the giant bear's head to look at Kyungsoo, whose face had lost all of its colors. "Huh?"

"Where is Jinni?"

"What?"

"I asked you, Kim Jongin," Kyungsoo's eyes were bloodshot now. "Where the fuck is my son?"

"Kyo Jin is right here—" Jongin dropped the bear onto the ground with a dull thud, looking frantically around.

"What happened?" A voice spoke behind them. It was low and familiar.

When Kyungsoo and Jongin turned to look who was approaching them, they saw Baekhyun's and Chanyeol's worried expression. What the hell were they doing here?

"You two lost Kyo Jin?" Baekhyun screeched, shaking Kyungsoo's frozen body.

Kyungsoo seemed woken up out of his daze at that, he shot himself at Jongin. "You—" He spat the word out. "It's all your fault."

Jongin drew a shuddering breath, fearing the worst. There was a coil in his stomach that made him feel like throwing up. He struggled to catch Kyungsoo's wrists to stop his pommelling.

"Calm down, Kyungsoo. We gonna find him," he reassured the older, but his own mind was a whirlwind right now. He could not believe he had just let go of Kyo Jin.

"You're so dead, Jongin." Kyungsoo pushed at Jongin's chest before huddling his body down, panting hard.

"He's right, Kyungsoo." Chanyeol supported his friend's tremblous body. "We should go find Kyo Jin right now."

They separated in different directions for their searching. Baekhyun went with Kyungsoo because the father seemed too lost himself to find another person.

On his bustling way to the balloon booth, Jongin was caught in the shoulder by a hand. He swirled around and was surprised.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Jongin asked stupidly. "You two even hate fairs."

"Oh, come on, Jonginnie," Luhan rolled his eyes, urging him to keep jogging to the booth they were heading. "We're assholes, but it's your first ever fucking date. We got worried. And you fucked it up already, didn't you?"

"You have been stalking us?"

"Don't act that surprised," Sehun clicked his tongue. "Now be grateful that we're gonna help you find that tiny bunny."

And just like Jongin guessed, Kyo Jin was indeed clinging to the man selling balloons. But he did not look happy with all those balloons, he looked exactly how he was. Lost. There was a glint of guilt in his glassy eyes, his cheeks flushed red with fear and escaping tears. The man with the balloons was looking from left to right, clearly finding the boy's guardian.

"Jongin hyung," Kyo Jin shouted to him and left the balloon man's knee to stumble towards Jongin, who was running towards him in a haste that almost made him trip over himself.

Jongin had never felt this relieved in his life. He scooped the tiny boy up and held him dear to his chest. "I'm so sorry, Kyo Jin. I'm so sorry." His voice was tremble as he snuggled his nose into that familiar baby shampoo scent of Kyo Jin's soft hair.

Luhan and Sehun heaved out a sigh of relief, reaching out to stroke Kyo Jin' back to calm the sobbing boy down.

"Are you his father?" The man asked, frowning at him. He clearly disapproved of a parent letting their child on their own.

"No, I'm Kyo Jin's babysitter."

"No, he _was_ his babysitter," Kyungsoo voice spoke up in anger when his group reached them. Before Jongin could open his mouth, Kyungsoo turned from the man to look at him, his eyes distant. "You're fired, Kim Jongin."

"Calm down, Kyungsoo," Chanyeol tugged at his sleeve. "It's just an accident."

"I shouldn't have accepted your invitation to go here," Kyungsoo let his rage get on him, ignoring Chanyeol's words. "I trusted you. I trusted you to keep an eye on my son, and you just let him go. What kind of babysitter are you? You're just a boy." He spat the words out as harsh as he could. "I should've known this would happen. You even lost your parents before, how could someone like you be able to keep anyone by your side?"

Kyungsoo regretted it as soon as those words—those cruel, mindless words—left his mouth. The shock began spreading all over Jongin's features, and he abruptly took a step back as though Kyungsoo's words were poisonous. Maybe they were. His eyes were red, his lips pressed into a thin line. And when he averted his eyes, avoiding Kyungsoo's gaze, for the first time, Kyungsoo knew what being hurt by hurting other people felt like. What an irony!

And as if the nature decided to make things worse, the sky started pouring rain. People formerly enjoying the fair, the food, the games and whatever the fuck happiness they were feeling scattered to find shelters. Everything was becoming a chaos, but where Kyungsoo and his group stood, everything was in dreadful silence.

Jongin shallowed hard as he hugged and stroked Kyo Jin's hair one more time, kissing the boy's forehead before bending down to put him on his feet on the ground. Jongin excruciatingly realized that this was it, this was all over. It felt so sore. Not just because of Kyungsoo's words, but also because of those feelings that Jongin had given carelessly to the one who just saw him as a homeless, parentless, irresponsible boy.

Jongin walked away wordlessly. For the first time, he knew how much people could get hurt by love—one-sided love. For the first time, even fried chicken was not able to make things better.

Kyungsoo picked up his son into his embrace, hoping the heat of Kyo Jin's body would warm him up like it always did. It worked, it felt warmer, having his most important thing in his safety arms. But his heart felt cold. It had been thawed for the last couple of weeks, with Jongin's carefree, high-pitched laugh, and his sometimes sleepy eyes, and his pout when being scolded for messing the house up. Now it was no one else but him—Kyungsoo himself—who froze it again, by his own transient rage.

Kyungsoo watched Jongin go, feeling his eyes blurred—perhaps by the raindrops, perhaps by something else from inside of him.

There was no taking back.

But if it were true that Jongin was just a boy, so was Kyungsoo—he had just thrown a tantrum like one. And if it were true that Jongin could not keep his parents by his side, neither could Kyungsoo.

Was that why it felt so hurt? Or it was that Kyungsoo had fallen so deep?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for your kudos and comments, I really love them :) Idk if this chapter made you guys as sad as it made me while I was writing it, but I hope it had the same effect on you *laughs evilly* and sorry for ruining their first date :(


	6. A closeness

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!! I'm back quite soon LOL because I'm a laborious writer, yay me!! This chapter's pretty long because Gosh, Kaisoo needs all my words, and there's a short side story at the end about Hunhan. I think they deserved more scenes, but you don't have to read it if not wanting to, it doesn't affect the main story line. It's just a small story that I wanna share in the writing process.
> 
> Now, enjoy the read!! <3

Kyungsoo did not know what was wrong with his life, with himself.

All of his youth had been spent on trying to reach back those who had slipped out of his hand, those who had left him behind. And now when there was someone potentially willing to stay by his side, he pushed them away.

Jongin had come into his life like a splash of colors that Kyungsoo at first had been scared it would affect his plain, routined, monochromatic life. He had never liked colorful anyways. He preferred those simple. And he did not fancy the idea of more worries and responsibilities. And Kyungsoo knew that caring for another person—having feelings for them—went hand in hand with responsibilities.

But what was it about Jongin that made him feel this way?

Perhaps...

Probably...

Surely, Jongin had splashed his colors in such a gentle way at all the right places on the picture that was Kyungsoo's life.

He painted those skies at half past six a blue color of peace when Kyungsoo opened the door for him. He painted those chilly evenings an orange color of warmth when they shared the couch with the distance far enough not to touch, but close enough to feel the heat radiated off the other. He painted Kyo Jin a yellow color of joy and happiness with those games he himself came up with—even after that was half an hour of tidying up the house. And he painted Kyungsoo's cheeks—and hearts—a red color of feelings and emotions that he could not put his fingers on. _Yet_.

Jongin even dotted on the picture with small, simple, but precious patterns.

There had been no need of something too drastic like a candlelit dinner, or gestures too intimate like a back hug or hand holding, to make Kyungsoo drawn to Jongin. It was just those daily things that they shared together. A meal at lunchtime or a box of ice cream at late night, a story about annoying friends or spitfire customers, a fit of laughters at how much Yifan wanted to be a galaxy prince by buying a flat on the top floor of a 128-floored building, or a swing on which Kyo Jin sat between them and Jongin using his long legs to push all of them higher and higher. Those small, simple things that Kyungsoo had never thought he would treasure that much.

But why had Kyungsoo pushed Jongin away that day at the park? After all of those things they had together. In the surface one could say that he had been furious and the anger had given way to him. But deeper down, Kyungsoo knew that he had been scared. Right after yelling at Jongin to leave, he had wanted to undo those words. But he had feared of the prospect that Jongin would still leave anyways, like people Kyungsoo loved in his life had always done him.

If only people could say "Come back" right after saying "Go away".

~o~

"Appa, Jinni want see super hero Kai," Kyo Jin looked at him with puppy eyes. The boy even put on that pout that he had learned from his former babysitter.

Kyungsoo halted his brick building half-movement to stroke his son's hair. He said in small, gentle, but predominating hoarse voice, "Superman Kai has to save other countries, too, darling!"

"So he not come today? He not came yesterday, and yesterday's yesterday," Kyo Jin mumbled in his sulky voice, making Kyungsoo's heart break all over again. As if it hadn't broken already every night since that day. And holy hell, since when had Kyungsoo become this dramatic? Spending way too much time with Jongin and his dramatic self clearly got into him.

Kyungsoo had asked Yifan to take a couple of days off. He had already had a running nose back then, and standing in the rain for a good two minutes like a lovesick boy the other day obviously got things worse.

Now he had to play with his son with a face mask and an agonizing headache. Baekhyun and Chanyeol had promised to be at his home to help him take care of Kyo Jin. They were supposed to be here one hour ago. Why were they always here whenever Kyungsoo didn't need them, which meant almost all the time? And when he did, they were nowhere to be seen. Godamnit. Those two motherfuckers must be fucking right fucking now.

"Kyungsoooo," there came that voice that Kyungsoo was way too fed up with but still welcomed at this very moment, along with kicking door and falling boots and bickering sounds. Kyo Jin gleefully ran toward the hallway to greet his beloved uncles.

"Don't tell me you two was busy—" Kyungsoo grumbled right after seeing his friends' faces but being cut off.

"Ducking," Chanyeol confirmed. He even repeated, unnecessarily, "We were busy ducking." At least he remembered the lesson Kyungsoo gave him the last time he had spoken inappropriate words in front of Kyo Jin, with a black eye.

"Fine," Kyungsoo sighed. He didn't have the energy for preaching them right now. "Just keep an eye on Kyo Jin. I need some sleep."

He stroked his son's hair one last time before staggering upstairs. He fell on his beloved bed with a sigh. At least Baekhyun and Chanyeol could be helpful in this kind of situation.

If only Jongin had a phone, Kyungsoo might have sent him a message. To tell him to get back to his job—if he still wanted to. To apologize for what he had done wrong. And to say "I miss you".

What? No. Not that. Or at least not the last part.

Kyungsoo decided, that after getting better, he would just come and knock on Sehun's door, asking to meet Jongin, and then tell him to get back to his job in the most nonchalant and bossy tone that he could muster. But again, he was the one who had fired him. Kyungsoo could be that stupid, you can see!

 _If only Jongin would forgive him_ , Kyungsoo thought while oblivion slowly claimed him.

~o~

Kyungsoo was woken up by a horrendous train of clanking sounds. He looked from where he lay like a dead fish at the clock and groaned. He had just had a 12-minute sleep. He crawled downstairs to find Baekhyun and Chanyeol playing music with kitchen utensils in the living room.

As much as Kyungsoo wanted to strangle his friends, he only had enough energy to require, "Could you two take Jinni to your place? I'll get him tomorrow?"

His voice was soft, but apparently the stern look in his eyes made his friends jolt their act and swallow. They nodded without any further protests before hastily packing up Kyo Jin's essential things. Two minutes later the three of them left the house, with Kyo Jin still being too excited from the show earlier to realize he had just been sent away by his father.

Kyungsoo plopped down onto the couch, his legs totally giving in. He looked around his living room. There was no corner left without toys and kitchen tools. On the wooden floor there was even a puddle of water that had spilled from those glasses those two fuckers had used as instruments.

 _He would clean this mess after getting some needed sleep_ , Kyungsoo decided.

Kyungsoo drifted in and out of sleep for the next couples of hours. At some points he sensed someone entering his house, not just one person, because his blurry vision saw a lot of legs wandering around the living room. After that was a feeling of warm, soft blanket—his favorite feather blanket he got on his fifteenth birthday from his grandma—covering his own trembling body. At other points he heard some sounds from the kitchen, some brief conversations about rice and onion, and after that was the sounds of knife and chopping-board.

When Kyungsoo fully awoke, the night had fallen. The living room was dimly lit by the moonlight shining through the window behinds the couch Kyungsoo was lying. He moved his gaze around before his eyes settled on a familiar set of broad shoulders. The figure was sitting on the floor, leaning his back onto the couch where Kyungsoo's knee almost touched his back. The light of the phone's screen that he was watching created dark and light silhouettes, striking his facial features with all the sharp and soft angles.

He looked beautiful like this. He always looked beautiful. But everything that beautiful in this contorted world was only in dreams. There was no way Kim Jongin was here with him after Kyungsoo had insulted him for something that was not his fault, at least about the thing relating to his parents, the thing that Kyungsoo had no rights to speak.

And the fact that he was holding a phone proved Kyungsoo that that was actually a dream. There was no way Sehun would buy Jongin a phone. Or would he?

Then again, just to make sure that Jongin was actually there, Kyungsoo moved his knee a bit. And it touched the solid that was Jongin's back. Kyungsoo felt a bit light-headed at that point, not because of the fever, but of the fact that Jongin was materialized right here.

Jongin stirred from his seat at the contact, and for some reason, Kyungsoo had his eyes shut closed. He held his breath.

Through his closed lids, Kyungsoo sensed some movements of Jongin. And then there was a cool hand pressing on his forehead. The art of checking someone's temperature should not be this lingering, but not unwelcome to Kyungsoo. After that was a warm feeling of breath fanning on his face, then down to his lips. If Kyungsoo had not had a stuffy nose, he would probably be able to figure out what Jongin's scent was like right now, with this proximity. He anticipated what would come next, with Jongin's lips being this close to his, and his own heart beating in his ribcages like a drum.

Jongin blew a puff of air onto his mouth.

"What the fuck?" Kyungsoo shot his eyes open and jerked away from the face in front of him. Up this close, Jongin was more attractive, even the panic and embarrassment in his features could not obliterate his good looks. If it were someone else, taking Zitao as an example, the panic would definitely ruin all the beauty in one's face and make them look of unmanliness.

"I just—" Jongin pulled away hastily. "There's a feather from the blanket stuck on your lips."

Well, the said blanket must be worn out at this point, it had been six years.

"How did you get in here?" Kyungsoo asked, a bit out of breath, and raised his hand to his chest to calm his heart. Why was he behaving like this? It was not like he had expected Jongin to kiss him... Right?

"Baekhyun came to my place. I mean Sehun's place," Jongin scratched his neck and got up to get the light switch.

"He gave you the spare key?" Kyungsoo peeled the blanket off his body. Why suddenly it felt so fucking hot?

"Yes," Jongin nodded then helped himself onto the bean chair. "Uh, Baekhyun said you refused to eat anything or took the medicines unless I was here."

Kyungsoo gave him that judgemental look. Because, really, who would believe that?

"I know it was a lie," Jongin huffed. "But, I have another reason to come here, too" Jongin played with his sleeves now. "I don't know. I just guessed that it was my fault too that you got a cold. I brought an umbrella that day and just left with it like a selfish jerk."

"There were, like, seven of us at that time," Kyungsoo pointed out frankly. "You just couldn't cover all of us under one umbrella."

"Well, at that time, I only planned to protect you and Kyo Jin from the rain," Jongin looked at him in the eyes.

"Only the two of us?" Kyungsoo asked, face warming from the fever. Or was it?

"Yes, it was the plan, right? You and Kyo Jin, and me. The three of us to the fair. And have fun." Jongin was flailing his arms around to make his point now, Kyungsoo found it adorable. The cold definitely played some tricks on his mind, but he didn't mind it this time.

And they could have had fun, if it not for Kyungsoo just overreacting everything. He had the rights to be freaked out and upset when his son got lost, that was for sure. But he had no reasons to hurt other person for it. Kyungsoo found the urge to apologize.

"Jongin, listen—" Kyungsoo spoke up after a stiff silence, but being cut off.

"Aren't you hungry?" Jongin asked a bit too fast, shooting up to his feet. "I cooked rice soup for you."

Before Kyungsoo could say another word about how Jongin was able to cook, the tanned boy beat him to it. "Do you know that Jongdae your coworker is actually very good at cooking? He helped me cook the soup."

Kyungsoo opened his mouth, but being shut off again. "Okay, actually he did all the cook, I just chopped the onion." And after a beat, he amended, "Okay, so he helped me with the onion too. I just helped him stir the soup. Kyungsoo-ssi, don't give me that look. I know how to stir."

"No," Kyungsoo shook his head. "I just wanted to know why Jongdae was here?"

"Oh, you didn't notice?" Jongin's eyes widened in surprise. "The rest of your coworkers were here to clean up the living room while Jongdae and I were in the kitchen. Joonmyun suggested we call for cleaning service and he agreed to pay the bill, but Yixing said No, so that's it."

Kyungsoo nodded silently and after that ate the soup in silence. He didn't need to worry about Jongdae's cooking, but Jongin's open stares at him somehow made him nervous. And every time he started the conversation with "Jongin, listen," or "About the other day," or even just a word "I", Jongin would do or say something diversionary.

Until Kyungsoo had had enough. He felt guilty and he was not good at living with it. And even though Jongin was showing his charming, graceful dancing movements with a themed song that sang something about _Blow it like a flute_ , he could not help but feel the need to apologize right now. He shouted, "Jongin, could you fucking stop?"

Jongin abruptly halted his movement, and with one long stride, he was now right in front of Kyungsoo. The taller bended down to watch Kyungsoo's face closedly.

"Your face's really red," said Jongin, pressing his palm onto Kyungsoo's forehead again, and leaned in a bit too much to the older's comfort. "I'll get you some fever reducers."

And maybe, just maybe, with just a very small, very tiny part of him, Kyungsoo couldn't help his body getting flushed seeing Jongin's hip thrusts earlier.

Jongin turned around, about to leave. Kyungsoo hated this avoidance. He leaned forward and grabbed Jongin's wrist to pull him back. But maybe he pulled a little bit too hard, because before Kyungsoo could register what was going, he found himself tangled in a bunch of Jongin's limbs and his grandma's blanket.

Say Kyungsoo was such a horny little shit, mind you that he was just a bit over his teenage. His body had all the rights to react to the hot dude above him. So if Jongin said Yes now, things would get a bit fun.

In this position, they could just reduce their little remaining distance and fumble with each other a bit. A kiss or two, or a bit more that Kyungsoo wouldn't mind because Baekhyun had been actually right about that he hadn't got laid for longer than he could remember. Then there would be hands roaming and groping around, because Kyungsoo's body now was aching and if given some massage, he would welcome it. And a little of grinding and reaching to the release still clothed with someone else—someone this sexy and innocent at the same time—besides himself was a nice thing to have.

Kyungsoo knew that his thoughts now were inappropriate, for Jongin was his son's babysitter—or at least former. One way or another, he was someone Kyungsoo had hired to do his job of looking after his son—not someone who would have a casual sex with him. And he even insulted him before. Kyungsoo could not help but notice a stinging tug at his heart when he also realized that Jongin was not the one who was here to have a date with him, or in a relationship for that matter.

But again, Kyungsoo had always been of a reckless side—at least when he had been younger with less responsibilities. His parents knew about his sexual orientation after that fateful day, they had been mad, so mad. But they had never and would never know that their son had lost his virginity in his junior year at high school at some party with way too much alcohol and way too little distance between swaying, dancing bodies. And those little touches in some places had never done any harm back then.

Probably the most harm all of those littles would do now was of Kyungsoo washing his soiled pants and the blanket with a thought that his lated grandma would've disapproved if she had been still alive, but Kyungsoo thought it would be alright to just let his body take charge in stead of his mind this time.

Though his heart said otherwise.

"Sorryforthosewordsisaidtheotherdayatthepark," Kyungsoo let his words flood out, a little bit too fast.

"What?" Jongin looked confused, and when he talked, his body vibrated against Kyungsoo's.

"Listen," he said, trying to calm himself. And when Jongin began to open his mouth, he snapped, "and don't cut me off this time."

Jongin shut his mouth obediently and turned his head away, denying Kyungsoo his face. He didn't want the older to see the affliction that come into his eyes again. What came next surprised Jongin, because Kyungsoo didn't yell at him like the other day like he had expected. Kyungsoo still had his hold on Jongin's wrist, and with other hand he grabbed at his chin to force him to face him. Jongin felt blood in his cheeks.

Kyungsoo said in his low, warm, quiet voice. "I'm sorry, Jongin. I said the wrong thing at the park."

Jongin's eyes widened for moment before he blinked. "Why?" Jongin couldn't help but ask stupidly. "You seemed to truly mean it back then."

"It's not that we use our brain before speaking all the time, is it? I was just so angry," Kyungsoo mumbled. "And if I really meant it, then I wouldn't be better than you. I would be another irresponsible, stupid boy that couldn't keep his parents by his side."

Jongin was surprised, for he had not thought Kyungsoo would open up to talk about his personal things like this.

Given a chance, Jongin asked, "What happened?"

He shifted a bit so now he was lying just half on Kyungsoo with one elbow propped on the couch to support his head. Kyungsoo seemed not to mind, for he just pulled the blanket up a bit so it could cover his chest from the cold that was there after Jongin's heat left him. And Jongin already missed the warm of Kyungsoo's hand on his chin. Despite the narrow space, they both found it comfortable.

"My grades at Math were like in hell when I was at high school," Kyungsoo recalled, a grimace on his face.

"That low? That why your parents left?"

Kyungsoo glared at him and ignored the question as he continued. "So I had to come to my math teacher's place to be tutored and my sister was to pick me up after those classes. About one month in, they dated. My parents didn't like it because she was younger than him too much, they even more hated it when they found out she was pregnant. But we had no choice. Two months before my sister's wedding, that fucking horny bastard of a teacher—"

"Whoa, whoa, calm down," Jongin cooed when Kyungsoo looked as though he was going to explode.

Kyungsoo huffed, but continued with refrained voice. "One time he caught me making out with a guy in a janitor room."

"Really, Kyungsoo-ssi? I didn't know you had been that naughty."

Kyungsoo was so pissed off at Jongin's interruption by this point. He snapped, "Yes, I was. So do you want to know about me or not?"

Jongin blinked, then nodded, because he wanted to, getting to know more about Kyungsoo that is. That was his motive after all: know him, understand him, and love him properly. So it wouldn't be a stupid crush anymore.

With a sigh, Kyungsoo kept on with his story. "He asked me for sex that evening when I was studying at his place. He promised to curve my marks to better and wouldn't tell on me to my parents about my sexuality."

"So you agreed?"

"Kim Jongin," Kyungsoo screeched despite his sore throat. "I will slap you in the face like I did that motherfucker teacher at that time if you keep asking stupid questions."

For a brief moment, Jongin almost considered he should leave this house of Do Kyungsoo, whom he had been swearing to love, for good, just so he could save his life from this Satan.

"Before I could register the offer, he kissed me. I tried to push him away but—" Kyungsoo trailed off. And Jongin could see the tremor in his glassy eyes. "He pinned me down, Jongin. He pinned me down, and kissed me, and it was gross and I had never felt that dirty of myself and I—" His voice was cracking all over the edges.

"You felt dirty because you soul was pure, Kyungsoo-sii." As an awkward person, Jongin was somehow a smooth talker at some rare points in his life. But he wasn't saying it just to have something to say, he meant it. "Don't hate yourself for having that feeling."

Their gaze locked. And there was a trail of tear that began to run down his cheek. Kyungsoo seemed not to notice, until Jongin reached up to wipe it away with his fingertips. The pad of his fingers lingered on Kyungsoo's skin, soft like feather. It was an action so tender that Kyungsoo had to fight the urge to nuzzle into the other's chest and hide there forever, so that he could just forget there had been one time he was almost being raped. Kyungsoo had tried to be tough for way too long, and he wanted to be weak, even just for a fleeting moment.

But instead he looked away at some distant point again, not wanting to expose himself more, and continued. "My sister walked in at that moment. I felt so relieved that she was there, but she viewed it as we made out with the consensus from both of us. Jongin, I'm not defending her, but it's human nature. Instead of seeing the faults of the one we love, we blame on other people. We're failed to see the truth."

"But were you failed to show the truth? Did you tell anyone?"

Kyungsoo shook his head. "No, it just—I had never been the type who would explain myself. I actually never believed in confiding in others. I never believed they would understand."

"So do you believe it now?" Jongin's voice was soft. He didn't elaborate, but Kyungsoo got it just as well.

"I think I do. Now. That's why I'm telling you this." He smiled, at Jongin, and mostly at himself.

"I'm glad you do," Jongin responded with a snort of laugh. And maybe Kyungsoo was imagining things, because he felt Jongin nudge his nose onto his hair and breathe in deeply. Before Kyungsoo could ask him what he was doing, Jongin got back to the main story. "Then what happened?"

It was a pain in the ass to recall the past, Kyungsoo realized. But the fact that he was doing it with no one else but Jongin made it less hurtful. He cleared his throat, getting rid of the lump stuck there, and continued.

"After that was a chaos. She insisted on abortion, but the baby, it's not his fault. I begged her not to, but after giving birth she left with only a letter saying not to ever contact her. The teacher left the country for good as well, after throwing at us some money as a financial aid for the baby and to shut our mouth up. He never saw Kyo Jin as his son. I would not let him take the child either, I couldn't trust him to raise Kyo Jin.

"My parents decided to take Kyo Jin into the orphanage after that because they were just too old and weak to take care of a baby, but I took him back because—because he was just a child. My parents left eventually after being an object of general derision about having a daughter that abandoned her own child, and a son who slept with the baby's father."

There was a bile taste rising in his throat. Jongin had known that the way Kyungsoo acted all bitter and grumpy was because of something dark in his past, he just hadn't known it had been this dark and even hopeless to some extent. How could an eighteen boy dealt with all of this?

"Rumors are a shitty thing, Kyungsoo-ssi. And people believe what they want to believe. It must have been so tough for you," Jongin said, voice tight. 

Kyungsoo just nodded and drew in a shuddering breath. That was when his tears escaped his eyes without control.

"Is this okay if I do this?" asked Jongin, and wasn't sure if it was a right thing to do, but he couldn't help but wound his arms around Kyungsoo trembling body and draw him close. He had never seen Kyungsoo this fragile and vulnerable. And the older just hummed without showing any sign of disapproval. Jongin took his silence as a cue to hold him in his arms more tightly.

"I've worked at the bakery shop ever since," Kyungsoo heaved a breath out after calming himself down. He said when Jongin finally released him from his embrace. "My coworkers are all weird and shit, Baekyun and Chanyeol deserve to be punched in the face once in a while, but they are all I have. They are my family, the family that doesn't abandon me when things get hardest. They have helped me out a lot."

"They're the weirdest group of people that I've ever had chance to meet," Jongin contemplated. "But the fact that they closed the shop for a whole evening to come here made me see them differently. They're good people, good weird people. But what is that with the name of the bakery? EXO? Weird."

"They think they're some kind of aliens. Handsome aliens." Kyungsoo chuckled at this. "And says the one who is weird as fuck," he addressed Jongin with a smirk despite his puffy, red eyes.

Jongin pouted, and shook his head. "Anyways, you have me now, too, Kyungsoo-ssi. I can help you out too." Jongin grinned, stroking the shorter's messy hair affectionately. Then he added, awkwardly, when Kyungsoo just blinked at him. "I know you don't see me as family, but maybe friends."

Kyungsoo was indeed considering letting Jongin in his weird family circle. But granted him another role. His partner? God, not that Jongin was his boyfriend or anything. Kyungsoo shook his head at his own thought. He said, finally, with his feigned serious tone. "Friends don't take charge when they help babysitting other friends' children."

Jongin laughed at that, and he saw Kyungsoo lips curve up as well. He framed Kyungsoo's face with one palm, rubbing his thumb in small circles on the plump cheek. He then slipped his hand further until it held Kyungsoo nape. Jongin pulled the other's head onto his chest again with a sigh.

"You, me, and Kyo Jin—Our parents left us, it's not our fault," whispered Jongin against Kyungsoo's hair, rocking him to and fro as soothing a baby. "It's just that we were unfortunate. And they were unfortunate, too, for leaving us behind."

Kyungsoo lifted his head to look up at him. His gaze moved from Jongin's soft eyes, to his adorable nose, and finally fixed on his slightly parted lips. He shifted in his position, and with the pressure of Jongin's hand on his nape, he leaned in. Jongin's lips would be moisture and soft when they brushed against his. Jongin's tongue would be graceful like his body earlier when it danced with Kyungsoo's own. And the taste of Jongin would linger on his lips, his tongue, his throat, and deeper down, in his heart. Kyungsoo thought it would be like that, their first kiss, with no much of a commitment, but with an unsaid promise for much more later.

But of course Kyungsoo must have done something bad in his previous lives, or even earlier in his current life, because karma was being bitchy to him now.

"Kyungsoo, Kyo Jin insited to come home to his Appa and his Jongin," there came that high-pitched voice in his hallway. Again.

Kyungsoo, without much thought, pushed Jongin away from him in a mere panic moment. He did regret his action when there was a loud thud of Jongin's body hid the floor and his familiar unmanly yelp. With quite a struggle, Jongin scrambled to his feet.

When Chanyeol and Baekhyun showed up on the living doorframe with Kyo Jin holding their hands, both of Jongin and Kyungsoo had managed to appear casual and nonchalant as if they hadn't just cuddled next to each other just five seconds ago. Cuddle? Was that the right word, Kyungsoo contemplated.

But there were things that must have given them away. A dishevelment of their hair, a deep rosy blush on their faces, and a stutter in their voice.

And there was one thing that Kyungsoo felt had changed where they were standing now. Not just an acquaintance between a father and his son's babysitter. Not just a platonic friendship. It was a leap in their hearts that were uncontrollably beating too loudly in their ears, their pulses, and their chests.

~o~

Later that night, when Jongin finished cleaning up Kyo Jin and laying him onto his crib, he made his way to where Kyungsoo was sleeping tiredly on his bed.

Jongin did not know how much time he had spent standing next to the bed and looking at Kyungsoo's profile—the tumbles of his black hair, the smoothness of his light skin, the soft and round of his features—and wondering how much more he would want to reach out to Kyungsoo in the future than he was now.

And he did not know what to make of the moment earlier. The moment where Kyungsoo's and his lips were just a hair's breadth apart. Jongin could finish what was left undone back then right now. He could just lean down and give a chaste, sweet, kiss onto Kyungsoo's full lips. But no, he would not do that. Because despite how much he wanted it, he wanted Kyungsoo's heart more, and he respected what it wanted when its owner was conscious.

Jongin was pulled out of his haze as Kyungsoo fluttered his eyes open. Jongin started for being caught. He hastily spoke up "I'm leaving now," and turned.

Kyungsoo's voice was raspy and almost inaudible.

"Stay."

Jongin swirled back too fast, and looked at Kyungsoo, who was slowly sitting up. The older reached out from under his blanket. Jongin's breath got stuck in his throat when Kyungsoo took a hold of his hand.

"Stay the night," Kyungsoo eyes were droopy with sleepyness, and he seemed to be elsewhere.

"O—Okay," Jongin stammered, feeling Kyungsoo's heat transferring into him through their connected hands and the tingle between their fingers. "I'll take the couch."

Kyungsoo mustered up all his strength to pull Jongin onto the bed. With some stumbles here and there, they were now lying side by side, facing each other.

"Stay the night _with me_ ," Kyungsoo said as he pulled the blanket up to cover both of their bodies.

"Kyungsoo-sii, I know you will regret it when you're in your right mind," Jongin pushed the words out. He wanted to be close to Kyungsoo like this more than anything in the world, but this was just Kyungsoo's cloudy head that drove him into this.

"You don't know," Kyungsoo heaved out a content sigh as he snuggled up against Jongin's warm body. He murmured against Jongin's chest, "Jongin, you can call me hyung. That would be nice."

"Hyung," Jongin called, tasting the word sweetly on his tongue. It was like a whole development in their relationship, whatever it was.

"Hm?" Kyungsoo hummed and rubbed his nose onto Jongin's chest. And for a moment, Jongin could feel something wet trailing through the fabric, as though Kyungsoo had just wiped his snot with it. Clearly Kyungsoo in his wrong mind wasn't obsessed with hygiene like he had thought.

"Are you not afraid that I would do something to you?" Jongin asked, thinking back how down Kyungsoo looked while recalling his past.

"You had had plenty of chances to do something to me, but you didn't. And I've learned how to headlock, so be aware." Kyungsoo lifted his face from Jongin's shirt to look at him blankly—threateningly.

 _'Do you know how to liplock, too, hyung?'_ Jongin wanted to ask, but didn't. Because of course Kyungsoo knew. And just thinking about it made Jongin's body flushed all over again.

Still, now or never. "Hyung, how about li—"

"Ask one more question and you will take the couch." Kyungsoo could feel Jongin's uneasiness when being this close to him. Jongin must be afraid of being infected by his flu. He turned around and moved his body away from Jongin until he was near the edge of the bed. "Or just leave the house," he mumbled to himself, suddenly feeling sulky as ever.

A minute or two later, Kyungsoo felt the mattress dip near where he was lying on his side, and after that was Jongin's warm embrace around him, one hand across his torso naturally. As though it were meant to be like that. Perhaps it was.

"Goodnight, hyung," was a murmur against his scalp, with a tone that was warm, soft, and tender. Kyungsoo had never realized how much lonely he had been on his bed until now.

 

* **Side story** : How much Sehun hated fairs?

"I won't go," Sehun shook his head. He tried but failed to focus on the job of brushing Vivi's hair while his boyfriend kept running his index finger around his belly button. "I hated fairs, or crowds for that matter."

"Come on," Luhan blinked up at him, all glistening eyes and rosy lips. Despite his evilness to other people, Luhan was an adorable, kittenish, boyfriend. "I will let you eat sushi on my stomach when we get back."

Sehun hastily climbed off the bed.

"Where're you going?" Luhan shouted after him as Sehun disappeared into the bathroom, Vivi crawling his paws onto the door with plaintive woofs at the sudden lack of affection from his owner.

Not a minute later, Sehun emerged, dressed up in his most gorgeous outfit. Luhan raised an eyebrow.

"What?" Sehun asked, looking down at his own body to check if he had zipped his jeans.

Luhan raised his other eyebrow, along with a smirk.

"Don't just lie there," Sehun urged, pulling his boyfriend off the bed. "Let's go to the fair."

Sehun almost regretted his decision to come when the crowd kept pushing at the two of them at the entrance, but Luhan clinging to his arm made up for it.

Sehun almost regretted buying the cotton candy which was overpriced at the fair, but Luhan using his fingers to feed him with it, then sucking on them to lick off the remain, made up for it.

Sehun almost regretted getting into the Ferrish wheel because he disliked the height, but Luhan kissing him passionately in the sunset like the most romantic thing in those cheesy movies that Jongin watched every night made up for it.

But then, at the end, Sehun did regret going to this fair, or more specifically, regret meeting his friend at the fair. He had to witness the break-up of an unestablished couple, watch Jongin walk away with Sehun's denim soaked with rain, and then trail after his boyfriend who was trying to comfort the miserably lovesick boy.

And Sehun knew that tonight there would be no sushi on Luhan's stomach. Because his boyfriend was actually a softhearted person. His deer would spend the whole night watching puppy films and eating ice cream with Jongin on their—Luhan's and Sehun's—cuddle couch, and Sehun was left alone in his bedroom with Vivi as his only companion. Not that Vivi was not enough, but having Luhan there with them would be much nicer.

After all, Sehun still hated fairs. But not as much as how he did Jongin. For his idea of going on a date at the fair. Stupid fairs, stupid Jongin!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so so much for your love to this story!! It means so so much to me and helps me write quicker and better (or at least I think so lmao) <3


	7. And a happy ending

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we go, the last chapter :):( I'll miss this so much T^T Ah~ this is supposed to be around 15k words, and now it's doubled lmao
> 
> Now enjoy reading!
> 
> Notes: This chapter hasn't been edited properly and contains the smusttest thing I've ever written *hides behind a curtain*

Kyungsoo didn’t know when it started precisely, but at one point there was a sensation of hands on his body, from his neck to his chest, down to his soft stomach where it began to tighten, then back up again to pry his lips open. A soft whimper left them. And when a hand once again snuck down his skin and took a grasp of his member and began to stroke it urgently, Kyungsoo, before he could help himself, gasped. And strangely, he didn’t protest. And it continued like that, with all the squeezing and twisting that Kyungsoo liked. When the sensation became overwhelmed, Kyungsoo let a moan escape his own throat.

“Jongin—”

“Hyung,” the voice of the said boy was breathed straight into his ear, and Kyungsoo jolted, eyes flying open. He turned his head to look at the figure beside him in the dim room, and realized that it was Jongin indeed, lying right next to him and looking back at him with unreadable expression. There was still a hand in his pants, a panic rise up inside Kyungsoo, and after a moment of registering everything, he realized some things. Firstly, obviously, Jongin had been sleeping next to him all that night. Secondly, Kyungsoo had just come in his pants. Thirdly, much to his relief and own embarrassment, it was his own hand, which was less creepy than Jongin’s one, right? But lastly, what made Kyungsoo want to crawl under the bed and hide there forever was that he had just had a wet dream about Jongin, and he had practically moaned it out loud.

“You need something? You called for me?” Jongin asked in a whisper, clearly not wanting to wake Kyo Jin up at four o’clock, reaching out to touch his forehead, and turned his body to turn on the lamp. “You’re sweating too much.” Kyungsoo heaved out a sigh of relief. So Jongin hadn’t noticed what crime Kyungsoo had commited.

“It’s fine,” Kyungsoo’s voice was a bit out of breath, and he tried to wringgle himself a little in flavor of concealing the act of pulling his hand out of his underwear.

“I think we should change the blanket, it’s soaked,” Jongin said, and he was about to peel the blanket off Kyungsoo when the smaller clutched at it tightly, all too aware that Jongin would see his soiled pants if he was uncovered.

Jongin’s brows furrowed, and Kyungsoo felt a deep blush gracing his already flushed cheeks. “I can do it myself. Just—Could you just leave the room and take the couch?” He couldn’t miss a glint of hurt flashing over Jongin’s eyes, and all too sudden felt angry at himself, for asking him to stay just to kick him out like this. “It’s just too hot with two of us on the same bed,” he tried to explain, wishing it could somehow make his dismissal less menancing.

Jongin, with a resigned nod, said nothing before climbing off the bed. When he reached the door, he looked back at Kyungsoo, as if asking Kyungsoo to ask him to stay, but still not utter a word. Kyungsoo wondered why it was always him make thing difficult to himself.

For the rest of that night, Kyungsoo was occupied with doing laundry in the most quiet way he could master, and toss and turn in his bed, replaying back the event earlier, the wet dream he had that was so vivid. Playing with the thought of making out with Jongin was one thing, but having wet dream about them having actual sex was another whole thing. And Kyungsoo felt guilty to no end, because he had somewhat used Jongin’s warmth beside him to get his imagination up as well as his climax, and after that used that warmth to push Jongin away again.

When the morning finally came, despite the still nagging headache, Kyungsoo got up from his bed, cleaning up for the second time, and woke Kyo Jin up. He still had today off from work, and he was planning on spending it usefully and wisefully. Grosery shopping seemed plausible.

Kyungsoo was about to holding Kyo Jin and himself straight to the front door, not even annoucing Jongin that they were going out, for he wasn’t really ready to face Jongin yet, but being confronted right away when he opened the door of his bed room.

Jongin took Kyo Jin from his arms and gave Kyungsoo a smile. It didn’t reach his eyes, however. And there were black bags under them. Jongin must have also had a sleepless night as him.

“I cooked you breakfast,” Jongin informed and took a hold of the short boy’s wrist. Before Kyungsoo could protest, he was led downstairs.

“I need to buy groceries now,” Kyungsoo made an excuse when being pushed into the kitchen. “Like right now.”

Jongin just shook his head. “Groceries can wait.”

“I just need something badly and-”

Kyungsoo was cut off but a finger pressed onto his lips. “Breakfast first. You're not totally recovered so I cooked for you and all I wanted to hear is a _‘Thank you, Jongin’_ after you finish it.”

How could Kyungsoo say No to that? To Jongin in general? So he wordlessly sat himself onto the chair and watched as Jongin laid a huge bowl of soup onto the table then another small bowl of familiar green and orange soup for Kyo Jin. Kyungsoo looked at his bowl, taking a deep breath and felt thankful that his nose had stopped its stuck, and was surprised that the soup actually smelled good. He took a spoonful into his mouth. And choked.

He kept coughing until his eyes got blurred by tears, through his watery vision, he saw Jongin panicking and trying to pad his back soothingly. When he finally successed in catching his breath, he saw Jongin worry his lower lip with the most embarrassed expression.

“I just tried to cook like how Jongdae instructed me and added something in. I didn't know it would turn out this bad. Sorry,” mumbled Jongin, averting his eyes.

Yes, saying it was bad was an understatement. And Kyungsoo was wondering what the hell that something was. It was fucking horrible, Kyungsoo’s mind screamed, but his mouth formed otherwise. “No, it’s good. It’s just too hot.”

Jongin perked up instantly, “Really?” At Kyungsoo’s nod, Jongin gave him that expecting look, nodding at the soup, asking Kyungsoo to continue his meal. Kyungsoo cursed himself innerly and wondered what he had become. If it were any other people, Kyungsoo would have just yelled at them for insulting the cooking. But now, he was here, trying his utmost to swallow down the fucking huge bowl, just to make Jongin feel happy.

When he finally, _finally_ , finished the soup, he muttered a _Thank you_ , at which Jongin grinned almost childishly. As much as he felt thankful and touched, Kyungsoo just wanted to bolt right away. Jongin just kept being nice to him when he did nothing but keep him away. And it pained him.

Jongin raised his voice into the silence that fell on them while feeding Kyo Jin. “I think when this summer's over I will quit this job of babysitting.”

Kyo Jin was the first one to react to this news. "Jongin hyung you leave?

Kyungsoo didn’t know why he would be bothered by this like he was now, and he felt a bang in his heart. “Wh—Why?”

Jongin just smiled brightly at him and Kyo Jin, perhaps not as sad as Kyungsoo felt at the decision. “Kyo Jin will go to the kindergarten, he will meet a lot of friends his age, and I will go to college.”

Kyungsoo felt a lump stuck in his throat which he cleared to get rid of it. “Oh,” he mumbled to the empty bowl, not looking at Jongin. “Have you had in mind which you’ll major in?” He asked, just to have something to say. He really didn't care what Jongin would study, it didn’t really matter. What really mattered was that Jongin would leave him. And why he felt that disappointment cracking his chest. It was not like Jongin had commited to be with him forever.

“Culinary arts, I think.”

Was that the sadness confusing his hearing? Did Jongin just say that he was going to study how to cook? And not only food and cooking, there were also other tons of stuff. Okay, that made Kyungsoo indeed care about his planning future.

“You mean cooking? For real?” Kyungsoo looked at him then, asking for repetition just to make sure he hadn’t hear it wrong.

“Yep,” Jongin still smiled, nodding his head in determination.

Kyungsoo couldn't help but asked “Why?” and felt himself grimacing.

"I have someone I want to cook for," Jongin said and let it hang like that. He didn't say who was that someone. And Kyungsoo couldn't fathom the jealousy he was having. "And I want to open a restaurant where I discover the the best fried chicken recipe. Soo Man ahjussi keeps telling me he will investigate in my charming and passion for food after I graduate. It sounds promising, right?"

He didn't know that Jongin was waiting for his reply until a palm touched his hand on the table. "We can still meet each other. Don't look like a dead fish, hyung."

After that day, Kyungsoo tried not to look like a dead fish, nor they talked much about the decision. Kyungsoo should be happy for Jongin after all, and it was his future.

And right to his words, after the summer that year, he left for another city to pursue his dream of being a chief. During those months when he was still here, Kyungsoo tried to relish every moment with him as much as he could. They tried to meet whenever their schedule allowed with Kyungsoo's part-time jobs at the bakery and as a translator, and with Jongin at the ice cream shop. At times Kyungsoo even envied his own son who had more time with Jongin and slapped himself several times for having such a weird thought. At nights both of them lullabied Kyo Jin into sleep and spent their alone time talking in whispers everything and anything until they passed out under the same blanket. They didn't talk about how intimate they were sleeping with each other like that, seeing it as a normal thing for friends. At first it was hard for Kyungsoo to control his boners at some nights, but he had managed to deal with it in the bathroom or take a quick cold shower. Kyungsoo spent their last few months together with no regret.

Only until the day before Jongin really left for college that Kyungsoo felt a weight on his chest. That was when he realized and regretted that he had never confessed his true feelings for Jongin. But if he did now, the confession, would there be any point of doing that? What if Jongin didn't feel the same? And if he did, it would only burden both of them with emotions and feelings of finally being together but apart at the same time.

"Hyung, are you avoiding me?" Jongin asked when Kyungsoo tried to concentrate on pouring the snacks onto bowls. Baekhyun had decided to throw a goodbye party for Jongin, a party that Kyungsoo didn't feel cheerful.

"No," grumbled Kyungsoo and cursed when the snack flooded over the bowl. Kyungsoo practically stared at the bowl but his mind was elsewhere. Goddamnit.

"You're not looking at me," Jongin said, and then there was a hand on his jaw to tilt his face to meet Jongin's one. Kyungsoo startled at the touch.

"I am looking at you right now," Kyungsoo replied flatly, sounding nonchalant that he didn't feel.

"You're looking at my chin," the taller boy pointed out and crouched until his eyes were level with Kyungsoo's. He could see the reflection of himself sulking in Jongin's warm brown eyes.

"Why are your eyes watery, hyung? Why are you crying?" Jongin's voice was of panic, now. And no, Kyungsoo was not crying. The one who cried was Kyo Jin. The boy had cried so much half an hour ago when he heard the news that Jongin would leave tomorrow. Kyungsoo was not crying like his three-and-a-half-year-old son. He was _not_.

Lucky for him that Chanyeol decided to show up in the kitchen at that moment, so Kyungsoo could use the interruption to look away and blink his tears away.

"Cheer the fuck up, Jonginnie, it's your party after all," Chanyeol laughed. "Come, come, I brought us some booze."

Kyungsoo didn't turn back to look at them, but hearing their footsteps become far away, and a faint protest of Jongin saying "I don't drink alcohol," and Chanyeol's reassuring that it was just some mixed juices. Liar.

An hour in a party, Jongin had already passed out on the couch, clearly wasted. Kyungsoo sat next to him and offered his shoulder for Jongin to lean his sleepy head on. The rest of the party goers were having fun, something that Kyungsoo should be doing as well. He just slumped there, watching people playing card games, not spinning bottle, not truth or dare, except Yixing, who, for once, seemed not to get high and played lego with Kyo Jin, with the assistant of Joonmyeon. Jongdae and Xiumin were raiding everyone’s wallet by their mastered skills in card games. Yitao and galaxy prince Yifan seemed not to understand what was going on and just running their hands through their hair and groaned.

Over ten, when most of their friends left the house after helping with the clean up, there were only Luhan and Sehun loitering behind. They helped Kyungsoo hoist Jongin's unconscious body upstairs and into their bedroom. No, wait—Kyungsoo's bedroom. Slip. Ah, scratch that. Their bedroom. Since when Kyungsoo didn't know, but it was _theirs_.

"Kyungsoo, can I tell you this?" Sehun spoke up as Kyungsoo took them to the door, holding his sleeping son in his arms.

"Yes, what's that?" Kyungsoo smiled at the at-last-black-haird boy, leaning in a little to hear clearly.

"I know it should be Jongin himself saying this, but apparently he eats too much chicken that he becomes one. And he has a huge fear of being rejected like how he had been by his own parents, so he would never say this. But Jonginnie, he has a crush for you for a couple of years by now, and it's pathetic that—"

"What?" Kyungsoo cut him off, despite knowing that he was being impolite. "Years?"

Sehun and Luhan exchanged a look, and Luhan sighed. "He didn't tell you about that too? He has always watched over you and Kyo Jin since the day your parents brought the baby to the orphanage."

After that Kyungsoo listened intensely to Jongin's best friends talking about how Jongin saw him, fell in love with him, met him at the supermarket, and finally came into his house with a yellow brief. It was cheesy and creepy in natural, but to Kyungsoo's astonishment, he felt it touch his heart in the most hurtful yet wonderful way.

Haft an hour later, when the house settled in sleep, Kyungsoo still found himself taking in Jongin's beautiful features, carving them into his mind and heart. Perhaps this was the last time they lay this close to each other. He unconsciously reached out to touch Jongin's cheek, and the younger fluttered his eyes open.

"Hyung, do you want to—"

~o~

Jongin couldn't believe he was having the worst hangover on the day he had a flight to another city. He held his head, trying to massage it, and even before his head could function normally, Jongin realized that he was stark naked.

Jongin shot up from the bed, hastily wrapped the sheet around himself before looking around to find his clothes. They were scattered all over the floor. God, what had he done?

Before Jongin could pick up his yellow brief, Kyungsoo emerged from the bathroom. Wet, and flushed from the heat of the shower. And there were bruises on his wrists. Was that—Was that Jongin’s doing, when holding his wrists to pin him down onto the mattress, and—and—God forgives him.

Jongin gulped. “What the—? Why am I—?”

“So you don’t remember?” Kyungsoo asked casually as he dried off his black hair, which looked more sleek and beautiful when being damp, with a towel.

“Remember what? What happe—” Jongin stammered, clutching more tightly the sheet around his body.

Kyungsoo pouted. Freaking pout. “The thing between us.”

Jongin shrieked, and Kyungsoo threw the towel at his face to shut him up. “Hush! You’ll wake Kyo Jin up.”

“Oh God,” Jongin groaned, slidding onto the floor. “Can’t believe we did that when I was drunk. It’s all wrong.”

Kyungsoo suppressed a laugh bubbling in his throat. He decided to play along. “Oh. So now you regretted it.”

Jongin looked up at him from where he slumped on the floor. “No,” he whined, voice weak. “I just don’t want our first sex to happen when I got drunk.”

That had Kyungsoo raise an eyebrow. “So you mean when you’re not drunk, you want to have sex with me. Gosh, Jongin, I didn’t even mention anything relating to sex. You have such a dirty mind.”

Jongin shot up to his feet at the accusation which was true to some extent, and shook his head. “No. No, I’m not a pervert. I just—”

Kyungsoo was not better than him whatsoever, so he decided to stop his messing with Jongin. “Enough. Now clean up and get your stupid ass downstairs. I cooked breakfast for you.”

Kyungsoo made it to the door when Jongin raised his voice again, this time breathlessly. “Kyungsoo hyung, why are you walking funny?”

Kyungsoo did not turn to look at him, but laugh quietly. "Hurry, unless you wanna miss your flight."

When they were going to part their way at the airport, Kyo Jin sobbed violently against Jongin's chest, clinging to the tanned boy. It took all of Kyungsoo's strength and comforting words to pry the boy away. It was cheesy and cliché, but right before Jongin stepped through the security gate, he turned back and ran towards where Kyungsoo and his son stood. And he hugged Kyungsoo, almost too tight, but this time Kyungsoo hugged him back, breathing in the scent of Jongin and trying not to cry.

They kept in touch after that, texts on working days and a phone call or two during weekends. Kyungsoo moved on with his life like how he always had done, but now with a place in his mind, and heart, and home waiting for Jongin to inhabit. Sometimes life got hard like it always did to all people. Kyungsoo felt out of energy and exhausted to his bones when deadlines or customers got too overwhelming. Jongin, who had no talent at cooking since birth, struggled with studying, not to mention the loan he got from the college burdened his mind. But they never had a moment of giving up on life and what they were trying to archive. Because Kyungsoo still had Kyo Jin his source of happiness and Jongin someone he was looking towards to.

In fact, all the three of them was looking forward to Christmas. Jongin could only be at home for a night before coming back to college for his part time job that paid double during the break, but that was all Kyungsoo could wish for. Jongin had booked a ticket to come home, promising that he would cook the best meal for Kyungsoo and Kyo Jin because he had processed a lot at culinary arts, something Kyungsoo was very proud of.

But, there were always _but_ s in cruel life, Jongin couldn't make it. The snowstorm that day had all the flights cancelled. That Christmas night when Jongin called to wish him a Merry Christmas, irony!, and his sorries for not being able to meet him and Kyo Jin.

"I miss you, Jongin," Kyungsoo bursted, voice trembling despite him trying to be steady.

There was a moment of silence before Jongin said through the phone, quietly, a touch of sadness palpable in his voice. "I miss you, too, Kyungsoo."

Kyungsoo fought his sob back lest Jongin would be more sad hearing him crying through the phone. Since when he became this weak and soft? Goddamnit. See what love has done to people?

~o~

Jongin did not have a happy Christmas, or a happy New Year, or a place next to Kyungsoo on his birthday, but when he opened his dorm room door to a knock on his own birthday, he didn't expect to see Kyungsoo standing there, cheeks a little red from coldness, or something else totally.

"Hyung—"

"Happy Birthday, Jongin ah! Kyo Jin couldn't come though, the weather is even colder here. Anyways I cooked seaweed soup for you, but clearly it's got cold at this point, but we can heat it up and—" Kyungsoo had somewhat picked up Jongin's habit of rambling, and all the words Jongin could hear in his head was _'Kyungsoo is here'_.

"Hyung," Jongin called again, breathlessly, and leaned in to capture Kyungsoo's lips. He just couldn't help it, and couldn't stand all the waiting anymore. He wanted it so badly, kissing Kyungsoo. And now that their lips were finally molded together, he felt the need to deepen the kiss. And he did just so. Kyungsoo's lips were cold and chapped for the weather was just too crisp and for he had probably forgotten to use his lip palm, but it was all that Jongin needed.

When he pulled away, Kyungsoo's cheeks had a deeper rosy color, and his eyes had a rounder shape. Jongin almost felt guilty and regretted doing such an impulsive action but Kyungsoo practically growled before pushing him into the room, closing the door behind himself, putting the luggage next to it, and lunged himself at Jongin.

The dorm room was small, so it only took a few stumbling steps before Jongin was pressed against the wall by the older's body. He brought their lips together. Kyungsoo was very good at kissing, when Jongin had no experience in this. So the tanned boy just followed the other's lead when their lips brushed against each other, and it felt hot and soft and moist now. Jongin's hands, at first not knowing where to put, gradually found their ways at Kyungsoo's hips, and when he used them to draw their bodies further against each other, a gasp left the smaller one's mouth. Jongin, despite being inexperienced, used this chance to lick his way pass the plump lips. When their tongue met and slid against each other, a firework of sensations was ignited. Every nerve of Jongin's body was being awoken and he instinctively arched his lower part into Kyungsoo's, deep moans emitted from both their throats.

Jongin hadn't done any of this make-out before, but when they finally pulled away to get some needed air, he saw the look in Kyungsoo's glassy eyes and understood the silent offer. They stripped while kissing, and not two minutes later they were lying with only underwear on the pile of clothes on the floor.

Jongin pulled away from the kiss and looked down at Kyungsoo, all flushed cheeks and abused lips. He placed a gentle kiss on the smaller boy's adam apple before licked a trail up to his ear where he sucked the skin slightly. Kyungsoo moaned and arched his back off the floor, creating a delicious friction. Their erections through two layers of thin underwear were hard to ignore. Jongin kissed his way down the pale chest and grazed one nibble lightly with his teeth and fondled the other with his finders. Kyungsoo cursed but not shoving him away, so that was a good sign that Jongin had learned more or less from watching pornography. When his mouth reached Kyungsoo's navel, he licked his tongue around the belly button, and the smaller boy had already threaded his fingers into Jongin's hair and thrusted his hips up for any kind of contact. His clothed member touched the tanned boy's jaw at the movement.

Jongin lifted his head a little to look up at Kyungsoo, who looked back at him with hooded eyes and parted lips. He looped his fingers into the waistband of the smaller boy's underwear and when Kyungsoo nodded, he pull the last garment down and tumbled to put it off as well. A first touch of his hand onto Kyungsoo's place of pleasure earned him a choke moan. He wrapped his long fingers around the length and felt it twitch and heavy. Jongin leaned closer and breathed. The scent of Kyungsoo's arousal made his throat dry. Was he really, finally, doing this with the one he loved? Yes. And he felt nervous, but not let excited.

"Jongin—" Kyungsoo whined at the first tentative lick of the younger's tongue onto his underside. This seemed to encourage Jongin, because he was sucking the tip now, occasionally pressing his tongue onto the slit, and Kyungsoo thrashed his head at the sensation. Jongin tried his best to swallow down the sharp as much as he could without gagging, and fondled with the balls as he hollowed his cheeks. The taste of Kyungsoo's precome was both salty and sweet on his tongue. When he drew up a little and grazing his teeth gentle over the sharp, Kyungsoo was going crazy trying not to thrust up into that wet, hot mouth.

"Jongin—um, stop," Kyungsoo breathed out, pulling the said boy's head away. If this continued, he would come in no time. Not that he didn't want to, but it could wait for another time.

Jongin sucked some hickeys at the inside of Kyungsoo's thighs before kissing the skin up until he reached the older's lips again. Before he could dive his tongue into his mouth, Kyungsoo had used his arms across Jongin's back and turned their bodies around, switching the positions. His knees were on either side of Jongin's thighs and he slid his fingers into the familiar yellow brief (Jongin seemed to really adore it), and pulled it down. He let it join his own underwear somewhere on the floor before getting to his feet and picking his way to the luggage. He came back straddling Jongin's lap with a small bottle of lubrication.

"Don't look at me like that," Kyungsoo huffed as he popped out the cap and squeezed a generous amount onto his fingers. "You should ask Baekhyun for this handy stuff." Jongin just smiled, for Baekhyun finally being useful.

It was really erotic watching Kyungsoo working himself open above him. Jongin could see one, then two, then three fingers disappearing into Kyungsoo's entrance, and the way his head was thrown back and revealing his pale neck was such a beautiful sight to behold. He then coaxed Jongin up slowly, too slowly, before seeing the pleading look on the tanned boy and deciding that it was time.

Kyungsoo leaned down to kiss Jongin as he used one hand to pry his cheeks open and the other to guide Jongin's member into him. Both of them gasped when Kyungsoo finally bottomed out. Jongin caressed the smooth skin of Kyungsoo's cheeks and at time squeezed them as the older swayed his hips back and forth slowly yet sensually, making it last long for both of them. But when Jongin thrusted up into him and hit a bundle of nerves there, he broke the needy kiss they were sharing and let a groan escape.

"Ah—Jongin ah," Kyungsoo groaned, panting. After that was no longer slow pace, he bounced onto Jongin with hands on the tanned chest to support himself. Jongin always met him half way and the sound of skin slapping skin filled the room with their short breathes.

"Harder," Kyungsoo demanded—begged. So what if he begged? It had been so long he made love with someone and this time this someone was the person he loved. So it was worth the begging and all. Jongin grunted at the plea, and with a swift movement, Kyungsoo was on his back with the younger on top of him.

Jongin hooked his arms under Kyungsoo's knees and rammed into the tightness. When he leaned down to kiss the junction between the other's neck and shoulder, he almost bended Kyungsoo in half, but he really didn't mind. When Jongin released his hold of his legs, he wounded his arms around Kyungsoo's back and pressed their chests against each other. Their hearts thrummed in sync with each other and Jongin's breathless calls _'Hyung'_. His thrusts into Kyungsoo and his abused prostate now were slow but deep and hard, and made Kyungsoo arch off and join their hips together. His member was between their bodies, and when they moved, it was rubbed with the most amazing friction. And the knot inside him tightened so much it hurt holding back. When Kyungsoo spurted his white seed all over their stomachs, his hold tightened further, and with some stuttered thrusts, Jongin was sent over the edge, hotness shooting deep into the boy he loved.

Afterward, they lay there with Kyungsoo's coat covering their bodies, sated and content. Kyungsoo lay his head onto Jongin's chest and listened to the gradually steady heartbeat.

"Are you aware that there's a bed?" Kyungsoo asked, laughing, the vibration and sound lively shot through Jongin's body.

"The bed is rickety. It'd fall down even before we got our dicks up," Jongin joked. Did he?

Kyungsoo hummed in indulgent agreement. "Jongin, why didn't you tell me you have had a crush on me for years?" 

Jongin just shook his head, frowning. "When did those two fuckers tell you about it? I'll kill them at some point."

"You should thank them though. But really, why didn't you tell me? You were afraid I wouldn't like you back?" Kyungsoo lifted his head to look into Jongin's eyes now.

Jongin stroked his hair in a loving manner, then sliding it down to play with the short hair at Kyungsoo's nape. "Not really," he said, and the older raised an eyebrow at him. "I knew you had some hot for me that night we first slept next to each other. I didn't want you to feel embarrassed so I pretended to not know you had jerked off in your sleep and called my name."

"Gosh," Kyungsoo hid his face in his hands. "It's embarrassing even now, you know? But why didn't you just tell me even when you already knew my feelings for you?"

Jongin pried his hands open and perked his nose sweetly. "I didn't know your feelings. I was just aware that I was hot and all, and if you had wet dream about me, it was just like your body screaming for basic need. I only knew you truly cared for me after I left and you still kept in contact with me. And when I heard you choked and trembling voice through the line on that Christmas eve, I just couldn't bear it. I thought I would kiss you the instant we met. I didn't expect it would be this soon though. But after all, thank you for coming all the way here and brought me seaweed soup."

Kyungsoo's eyes turned watery again. He didn't know how much loneliness had hurt until now that he got rid of it. He smiled through blurry eyes and whispered. "Maybe _karma_ isn't a bitch after all."

Jongin tilted his head in confusion. "What is _karma_ , hyung?"

Before Kyungsoo could answer, the phone in his coat's pocket ringed and vibrated. Jongin pulled the device out and put the phone on loudspeaker.

"Jongin hyung," the voice was always familiar, like those big eyes and chubby cheeks. "Happy birthday to you. Happy—" and Kyo Jin sang, almost off-key, his giggles between the lyrics sweet and full of joy.

Kyungsoo gave the younger a toothy smile before leaning in to give him a soft kiss, mumbling against his lips. "It's something good, Jongin. And you are one of it."

Fin.

—————

Side story: _What exactly did Jongin and Kyungsoo do after the party?_  
*Warnings: spanking, thigh abuse. You've been warned!  
**Sneak peek into this super disturb side story:  
"Ah—ah—be gentle, Jongin, it hurts."  
"That's right, hyung. Up and down like that. You look good like that. You can't even walk tomorrow."  
"Jongin, I—I can't—"  
Along with that was long groans and grunts muffled by flesh.

"Ah—ah—be gentle, Jongin, it hurts." 

Shit. Jongin was paper. And Kyungsoo was rock. He lost again. For the nth times.

Before he could hid his arms behind his back, Jongin had had a hold on his hand and yanked it towards him.

Jongin's teeth flashed in the dark when he grinned. Using two finger, the younger smacked him on the wrist. Kyungsoo's wrists, at this point, were all aching and sore.

Why was Jongin that good at playing rock-paper-scissors when he was wasted?

"Ouch," Kyungsoo grunted, trying to muffle his whining sound by clamping his mouth with his other palm. "No, we can't do like this anymore. My wrists can't take it anymore."

Jongin hid his giggles behind his hands, then he seemed to contemplate.

"What about standing up and lowering down squat? Twenty times if you lose."

Kyungsoo glared at him, but agreed nonetheless. "Fine."

Goddamnit. He lost again. And again. And again.

"That's right, hyung. Up and down like that. You look so good like that. You can't even walk tomorrow."

"Jongin ah, I can't—I can't do it anymore. My thighs hurt." Kyungsoo whined, legs trembling as he struggled to stand up for the 98th time. "My hips and butt hurt too. Have mercy, please."

Kyungsoo could not believe that one day he would have to beg Jongin shamelessly like this.

"What—what are you doing?" Kyungsoo hissed quietly as he climbed back onto the bed after finishing his punishment. Climbing hurt too.

"It's so hot, I need to remove my clothes," Jongin answered casually, as if it were a normal thing to take your clothes off on others's bed.

"Don't—stop," Kyungsoo stammered. "I mean stop. You can't just be naked here."

Jongin halted his action of undoing his zipper. He had already had the shirt off. Kyungsoo tried hard not look at his exposed skin and flesh.

"What about each turn I win, I put off one thing," Jongin bargained.

For some (perverted) reasons, Kyungsoo nodded. This time around, he even wasn't sure if he did not like losing. There was only a familiar yellow brief now.

Kyungsoo was scissors, and Jongin was rock.

Kyungsoo scooped up Kyo Jin from his crib and ran downstairs, face flaming.

That night, Kyungsoo took the couch.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all, dearest readers, for reading this story of three smol sons! <3


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